Clive Martin
Articles by Clive Martin
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Why Closing Southbank Skate Park Would Suck for London
If there's one thing London is lacking it's coffee and sandwich shops. Many's the time I've found myself stopping people in the street, saying, "Hey, you know what this city needs? More cafes." The people at the Southbank Centre share my opinion, as they'd apparently like Londoners to forget about that world famous skate park next to the Royal Festival Hall and instead associate the area with places where you can spend an hour's pay on a sandwich. Full story
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The Strange Beauty of the Chinese Politician Who Threw a Tantrum at the Airport
In essence, this is just a video of a man having a nightmarish experience at an airport boarding desk. (He'd had a long breakfast and missed his first flight, then had not heard the call for the second flight, apparently.) But watched through the lens of one of China's state-owne… Full story
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I'm So Sick of These Hipster Trombonists
The New York Times says playing the trombone makes you a hipster. So we called up a few to see if it does. Full story
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The Awful Legacy of the Libertines
As you’re probably aware by now, this week marks the tenth anniversary of one of the most influential moments in our shared history—the release of the Libertines’ semi-seminal debut album, 'Up the Bracket.' Let's surveying the wreckage of the album's tenth birthday. Full story
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RIP Men: An Obituary for a Gender
Reader, make sure you're sitting down. Please. I have some terrible news to break to you. The rumors have been circling for some time now, but this is no Twitter hoax. Earlier this week, the gender of Men passed away in a tragic bicycle accident. Full story
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MySpace Is Starting from Scratch, but Do We Want Our Old Profiles Back?
I decided to summon up a World Wide Ouija Board and visit the ghost of my teenage self to see what I like about him and what I really don't. Full story
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What Sort of Person Still Thinks 9/11 Was an Inside Job?
These people aren't of the "We'll never really know what happened," school of thought; they are 100 percent convinced that Dick Cheney was flying planes into buildings like a problem child with an Airfix model. But who the hell are they really? We stalked them on Twitter to find Full story
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The Wanking Deaf Vs. Jehovah's Witnesses
By now you've probably seen the Jehovah's Witnesses' warning video to horny deaf people. The video is essentially a couple of different signers emotively pleading with the viewer not to crack one off. Curious as to what the church has against deaf people jerking it, we called the… Full story
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Things That Need to Disappear from Dancefloors Forever
It would be bliss to live in a world where lecherous old, dancing men in open-buttoned shirts didn't exist, and "white-boy grinding" simply meant a metal cutter's apprentice from Ipswich going about his daily business, but we fear we're irretrievably past that point now. So it's Full story
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Olly Riley and the New UK Tween Twitterati
They're vain, inane, and attention seeking, and they're more famous than you'll ever be. But exactly who are they? I dipped my toe into the murky world of the Teenybopper Trolls to find out. Full story
Thought and Memory
New Fiction by Ed Park 
Malaysian Neo-Nazis
Fighting for a Pure Malay Race 
The Strongest Dwarf in New Jersey
Remembering My Tormentor 
Gay Men and Their Misogyny Problem
It's Not Cute Anymore 
Snooping Around Nicolas Cage's House
So Many Bummers 
Saudi Arabia's Feminist Revolution
It's Not Happening 
