The Totally Unnecessary DJs of E3

Perhaps playing loud dance music inside a giant convention center where everyone else is also playing loud dance music and no one is there to dance is a waste of time. I don't need the "bass to drop" while I'm waiting in line to see the new XBox or to use the bathroom, thank you very much. Full story

This Week in Racism

A Mexican American Child Sings the National Anthem, Racism Ensues

Ten-year-old Sebastion De La Cruz is a mariachi singer of some repute. Such a precocious young tyke should warm the heart of any normal human being. He’s so small, but he’s also doing a grown-up thing! It’s cute, plus hilarious. Well, some racists thought it wasn’t so “LOL-worthy… Full story

There's a Video Game Church (and It's Totally Lame)

While hanging around E3 in spite of myself, I heard about a Christian gaming organization called Gamechurch with a booth on the ass end of the convention center that was supposedly giving away free beer to anyone desperate enough to talk to them. Full story

This Week in Racism

This Week in Reverse Racism

I have decided to answer your prayers and dedicate this week’s column to the men and women single-handedly keeping the ridiculous notion of “reverse racism” alive. I will be ranking news stories on a scale from 1 to REVERSE RACIST, with 1 being the least reverse racist and REVERS… Full story

Michael Douglas Has No Control Over His Mouth

When I found out that Michael Douglas, star of 'Behind the Candelabra' and the movie that came before 'Basic Instinct 2,' claimed that oral sex gave him throat cancer, I felt like I had finally found a celebrity to admire. Sadly, he couldn’t even keep that story going, because h… Full story

This Week in Racism

Sending Racist Emails About Michelle Obama Is Not a Good Idea

Some of the hilarious zingers in some emails that a Virginia school-board member sent around included a photo of African tribal women next to the caption “Michelle Obama’s high school reunion” and another that implied that Mrs. Obama was paid a paltry $50 sum for posing in 'Natio… Full story

This Week in Racism

Sergio Garcia Can't Wait to Serve Tiger Woods Fried Chicken

When asked if he would be inviting Tiger Woods over for dinner during the US Open, famous Spanish golfer Sergio Garcia responded, “We'll have him 'round every night. We will serve fried chicken.” I’m glad that Sergio already has his dinner menu planned so far in advance. Full story

Las Vegas Needs to Get Creative with Its Homeless Problem

Las Vegas is sending their homeless people away with bus tickets and bottles of Ensure, but are there more creative solutions to this chronic problem? Sure there are! For instance, how about making the homeless into tour guides? Full story

This Week in Racism

Former Italian Prime Minister Dressed up Strippers to Look Like Barack Obama

According to testimony given during the prostitution trial of his three former aides, Italy's former prime minister Silvio Berlusconi was alleged to have dressed women up like Barack Obama, and had them perform stripteases. Now, I am not here to debate the erotic merits of Presid… Full story

This Week in Racism

Happy Confederate Memorial Day!

If you’ve ever pined for the good ol’ days of manners, gentlemanly behavior, long sips of lemonade on the porch during a hot day, and ungodly human bondage, then this is the holiday for you. And, like the LAPD, Ann Coulter, and the state of Michigan, you're a racist. Full story