This Week in Racism

Sergio Garcia Can't Wait to Serve Tiger Woods Fried Chicken

When asked if he would be inviting Tiger Woods over for dinner during the US Open, famous Spanish golfer Sergio Garcia responded, “We'll have him 'round every night. We will serve fried chicken.” I’m glad that Sergio already has his dinner menu planned so far in advance. Full story

Las Vegas Needs to Get Creative with Its Homeless Problem

Las Vegas is sending their homeless people away with bus tickets and bottles of Ensure, but are there more creative solutions to this chronic problem? Sure there are! For instance, how about making the homeless into tour guides? Full story

This Week in Racism

Former Italian Prime Minister Dressed up Strippers to Look Like Barack Obama

According to testimony given during the prostitution trial of his three former aides, Italy's former prime minister Silvio Berlusconi was alleged to have dressed women up like Barack Obama, and had them perform stripteases. Now, I am not here to debate the erotic merits of Presid… Full story

This Week in Racism

Happy Confederate Memorial Day!

If you’ve ever pined for the good ol’ days of manners, gentlemanly behavior, long sips of lemonade on the porch during a hot day, and ungodly human bondage, then this is the holiday for you. And, like the LAPD, Ann Coulter, and the state of Michigan, you're a racist. Full story

Horse Racing: The Sport of America's Lower Class

Much like the United States itself, horse-racing culture can be divided into the camps of “have” and “have not.” The disparity between the gilded excesses of the Kentucky Derby and the barren wasteland of Hollywood Park is stark. Full story

This Week in Racism

Clarence Thomas Thinks Barack Obama Was "Approved by the Elites"

Welcome back to the only internet column that is guaranteed to put you in a deep state of depression for weeks at a time. I’ll be ranking news stories on a scale of 1 to RACIST, with “1” being the least racist, and “racist” being the most racist. “I got 99 problems, but a raciall… Full story

This Week in Racism

Ann Coulter Wants to Arrest Women for Wearing Hijabs

Best-selling author Ann Coulter receives this week’s Ann Coulter Award for Excellence in Racism for declaring without reservation that the Boston Marathon bombing suspect Tamerlan Tsnarnaev’s wife should be imprisoned for wearing a hijab. Full story

Uninsured Americans Are Crowdsourcing Health Care Costs

David Price is uninsured and searching for health care from outside of government and private insurance. Just this month, David went biking alone in a canyon in Texas. David hit a large bump on the trail, the bike sailed out from under him, and he fell face-first into the ground… Full story

This Week in Racism

People Being Beaten up for "Looking Arab"

I have compiled all the most galling, depressing, exhausting cases of racism, either overt or covert, that I have come across in the last seven days. I will be rating each of these cases on a scale of 1 to RACIST. With '1' being the least racist, and 'Racist' being the most racis… Full story

Dear Elizabeth Wurtzel, No One Cares That You Still Get It on

Elizabeth Wurtzel, famed author of 'Prozac Nation,' dropped her latest bit of meandering narcissism yesterday in an essay that reveals she doesn't do drugs anymore, but she still bangs a bunch of people, goes to parties, and doesn't care what you think. Elizabeth Wurtzel is the o… Full story