BOA STEALS MACAW

By JAMES TENAFLY

In her recent lawsuit, Angela Iannelli claims representatives of the bank entered her house last October, damaged her property, and made off with her blue macaw named Luke — all over a bank error. While he was in her place, the bank’s contractor transformed into a veritable one-man gang-stalking session. According to the reports, he “stopped utility services, cut water pipes and electrical wiring, damaged flooring and finishings, poured antifreeze into sinks and toilets.”

Ms. Iannelli now seeks $50,000 damages for the incident and its attendant anxiety which she claims drove her to seek medical attention. And who can blame her? If someone broke into my house and kidnapped my pet, however annoying or obnoxiously piratey, I’d be pretty freaked out to. Especially if the job was done by some dopey contractor sent over on behalf of my inept, malevolent bank to completely ruin my life.

After Bank of America refused to intervene, Ms. Iannelli drove 80 miles to the contractor’s office and picked up Luke herself. He appears to be making a full psychological recovery.

By JAMES TENAFLY 1 year ago

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