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      don't

      Let me take a look at the ol’ Douchebag Checklist here… Super-tight pink tie-dyed spandex pants that crush your balls into oblivion: check. The undersized gym shorts of a 13-year-old girl, just in case your balls had even the slightest hope of survival: check. Drinking a piece of fruit with a straw to celebrate the death of your balls: check.

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