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      Larry the Edutainment Gator is available for children’s birthday parties, bar mitzvahs, and holiday gatherings. He’ll teach your kids songs about unconditional love, trying your hardest, and the joy of reading. For an additional $100, he’s also available to entertain single mothers after the festivities, a package that includes pounding cheap brews, chain-smoking cigs, and being 100% DTF.

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