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'Fortnite’ Porn Parody Has Biting Commentary About Free-to-Play Monetization

The ‘Fortnite’ porn parody has fornicating llamas, nut sack cosmetics, streamers, terrible puns, and an anti-microtransaction message.

Anything half popular will become a porn parody thanks to companies like WoodRocket and Pornhub, which have been churning out adult movies like Jurassic Wood, Dragon Boob Z , Oversnatch, and the classic Metal Rear Solid: The Phantom Peen.

In that tradition, WoodRocket has just released Fortnut—a porn parody of the mega-popular video game Fortnite. It’s got everything you want from a 20-minute porn parody: terrible acting, horrifying puns, pornography, and…biting commentary about free to play monetization.

The video opens with a streamer—played by Missy Martinez—setting up her team to play some Fortnut. We zoom in on the characters. There’s a skeleton, two people with default skins, and a man with a testicle for a head done in the style of Fortnite’s Tomato Man skin. Testicleman immediately digs into the default-skinned noobs, mocking them for not spending cash to get a sweet skin.

April O’Neil—acting in the film and also its writer—isn’t having it. “Sorry I save my real money for real things,” she says. Later, when Testicleman is shot down during the match, the woman taunts his corpse. “I guess the money you spent on skins should have been spent on not dying in the first few minutes of the game, dick.”

Fortnite is a free-to-play game and the only way to change the default skin is to spend in-game currency to unlock a new one. Players can grind out that in-game currency but, without spending money, it’ll take forever. Players who drop a few dollars for a battle pass or just spend money to get in-game currency can have a wealth of cool cosmetics. But that doesn’t make them good at the game. In my time playing Fortnite, I’ve been destroyed by players in default skins more times than I can count.

As far as monetization of free-to-play games goes, Fortnite is pretty chill. But the lack of progression for those without a battle pass has definitely stopped a few of my friends from investing time in the game. And Fortnut proves that even porn parodies hate microtransactions.