God DAMN it, it's Super Annoying Know-It-All Asshole Man, back in action.
We went to Corey Feldman's birthday party last year, and it was a total disaster. When we heard he was throwing a Valentine's Day party, we should have known to stay home. We went anyway, and it was also a total disaster.
E.T. was roaming the street robbing homies, when he ran into a dealer and asked him for Reece's Pieces. It didn't end well, but you probably already know that, because this is Johnny Ryan's page, not some 1980s Steven Spielberg kids movie.
A while back I was looking for a series of things to vandalize and post online for laughs. I started with photos from magazines and wrestling cards, and they were OK, but I wanted something a bit more unique. Then I discovered a few Chick tracts stored aw…