The Most Epic Bar Mitzvah Invite Ever

I’m not Jewish, but I’m pretty sure that I was invited to one of the Mitzvahs (Bar / Bat) when I was a kid. I didn’t go because I didn’t think that would be any fun at all. If I only had known this kid. Full story

Stories You Won’t Hear While Shopping for Music Online: Kill Bill

Tanya, a manager at a record store, performed in a Blondie cover band, wore hangover sunglasses indoors, and was obsessed with serial killers, so much so, that she was convinced her co-worker was one. Full story

Tour Stories

Pocket Sex

Ever have someone pocket dial you? It’s usually one of your female friends, and then you’ll get that callback later like, “Omg! I can’t believe I pocket dialed you! Imagine if I was like having sex or something?” And you both laugh because that would be so unlikely and so absurd… Full story

Nice Cans, Marc Jacobs

Marc Jacobs was hired on as the Creative Director for Diet Coke's dirty 30. We're just excited to see him with his shirt off, covered in sweet goo. Full story

Stories You Won’t Hear While Shopping for Music Online: Day One

In this new column, Kathy Iandoli tells stories from her five year stint as a record store sales associate. This one is about pee. Full story

How to Not Get Fat Through Rap

So I came across this weird music video slash cartoon last night and it said that if you take 80 bites of your food then your stomach will be too full to overeat. The video is about this rapping stomach named Sam. “I represent the folks in the lower intestine,” he rhymes, before… Full story

Tour Stories: What a Pisser

In the return of Tour Stories, a hip-hop legend wets his pants on a plastic conference room chair, and paints an office restroom with his own feces. Full story

Juicy J Talks Libraries and Strippers

It’s strange having a conversation with Juicy J. Judging by his music, you’d expect to sit down and learn from him the proper way to hold a dollar in between your teeth so some stripper can grab it while swinging from a pole. That’s not the case at all. The former Three 6 Mafia k… Full story

Ellie Goulding Takes the Cake in Making People Want to Eat Her Hair

Ellie Goulding is on some new shit. She’s entering 2013 fresh off a breakup with producer Skrillex, but is pretty optimistic about it. Ellie comes equipped with a fan base that wants to eat her hair and bake her cakes. And why not? Full story

Tour Stories

Happy Fucking Holidays

I have been very fortunate to not have to deal with many holiday parties throughout my tenure in the music industry. When I worked in corporate America, it was that night the whores in the office got to escape their husbands and give the guys in the Payroll Department “ironic” la… Full story