Getting Rid of the Bro Language in 'O Canada' Is a Good Start, but Let’s Keep Going

Last night, MPs in the House of Commons voted to change the lyrics of "O Canada" to rid it of that pesky "in all thy sons command" and replace it with a more gender-neutral "in all of us command."

The bill was the brainchild of Liberal MP Mauril Bélanger (who the national media have mostly referred to as Canada's "Dying MP" in headlines, gotta get those clicks) and now moves to the Senate. As you may know, but likely do not care about, the Senate has become a little more independent as of late and has been making some major changes to other bills, so there's no guarantee they will stop with just that one line in "O Canada." Since we only drunkenly mumble our way through "O Canada" at the occasional sporting event, we thought it would be best to investigate the complete lyrics of "O Canada" and make some suggestions to the Senate for other changes, where appropriate. O Canada!
Analysis: Strong start, no one will be confused about the anthem is about, unlike the Welsh.
Potential change: Yeah Canada!!
Likelihood of change: Prime Minister Elizabeth May Our home and native land!
Analysis: Well at least someone's acknowledging it's Native land
Potential change:Our home and stolen land!
Likelihood of change: "On behalf of the government of Canada, I promise we'll never ask about running pipelines through your land again." True patriot love in all thy sons command
Analysis: This anthem was clearly written by an MRA
Potential change: True patriot love in all of us command
Likelihood of change: VICE will write about "O Canada" on a slow news day The True North strong and free!
Analysis: This is actually pretty good marketing copy.
Potential change: We the North Strong and Free
Likelihood of change: Prime Minister Aubrey Graham From far and wide,
Analysis: Canada is fucking huge. No complaints.
Potential change:From mostly three habitable metropolitan city centres, as close as possible to the American border
Likelihood of change: A sovereign Quebec O Canada, we stand on guard for thee.
Analysis: This made a lot more sense when we were still literally standing at Fork York, worried America was going to invade over Lake Ontario.
Potential change:O Canada, I'm kind of busy that night actually
Likelihood of change: Donald Trump builds a wall between Canada and the US, busts through that wall like the fucking Kool-Aid guy to annex Niagara Falls God keep our land glorious and free!
Analysis: Take it away reddit/r/atheism
Potential change: We keep our land glorious and free!
Likelihood of change: You die and that's it O Canada, we stand on guard for thee
Analysis: This is very lazy songwriting
Potential change: Something about a beaver or a moose—or at least mention all the freshwater we should be hoarding for the zombie apocalypse—switch it up a little.
Likelihood of change: Prime Minister Avril Lavigne O Canada, we stand on guard for thee.
Analysis: Emphasis!
Potential change:Well, we pay some people, mostly from the poorer areas of the country, not very much to protect the country and then give them shitty veterans benefits when they come back from war zones.
Likelihood of change: Prime Minister Avril Lavigne Follow Josh and Amil on Twitter.