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Kill the Engine

Guided Tours of the Skate Spots in My Neighborhood

As a freelancer, I spend a great deal of time scheming on ways to bring in more money to my household.

As a freelancer, I spend a great deal of time scheming on ways to bring in more money to my household. One idea I had recently was to start giving guided tours of the skate spots in my neighborhood. Kids are always looking for new skate spots, right? And I've been skating long enough to know about a bunch of them in my immediate area. So why not combine those two truths and make some diaper money along the way? All of the following spots are within three blocks of my house, so we can totally skate to all of them. Or your mom can drive us there with minimal complaints. Fist stop, the up-ledge down-ledge spot down the street from my house. Which is exactly what it sounds like.

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One ledge goes up.

And the other ledge goes down. Or skate the other direction and reverse the order. You could also grind or slide the metal railing in between the concrete ledges. I would totally allow that.

And since this is a new service and I'm trying to drum up business, I'm going to throw the ledge across the street into the deal for free. I should also mention that absolutely nobody ever skates these things, so getting footage at these spots would be the equivalent to a skier or snowboarder getting fresh tracks. No need to worry about that ABD (Already Been Done) list. It's a NBD (Nothing's Been Done) situation. Boardslides are welcome.

Next we'll head over to this thing:

I think you could probably do a wallride to boardslide across and down this ledge. Actually, I'm sure of it. And again, nobody skates here so be sure to film it for your sponsor-me tape. Do they still call them tapes even though there's no tape involved?

After that I'll show you this beautiful curb spot.

Which is a two-for-one because there's also a pretty nice sized gap on the other side of the curb. You could probably wallie it if you went fast enough.

From there we'll head to this secret ditch that is totally shaded from the Texas sun. It kind of looks like Fern Gully down there.

And the ditch features a natural curb in one spot, which to ditch purists is kind of like finding a pool with perfect coping. Or a double set with a perfect run-up. Some crap like that.

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After the secret ditch I'll show you this driveway embankment. It's good for a kick turn or two.

And then over to this double sided curb/ledge thing. It's definitely seen better days, but it still has some tricks left on it. Or over it. Your call.

Then we'll check out this crusty bank spot. Nothing but potential. You can see that somebody has made a bicycle assistance ramp up the curb. We can do the same thing for your skateboard with a street sign and some wood or bricks.

The bank just keeps going…

…and going. Austin has so many bank spots that this one isn't even considered a spot. In some towns you'd have to skate proof this thing. We're spoiled here.

If you want to skate a small fire hydrant I've got one for you. It's hard to tell from the photograph, but this is only about knee high. Perfect spot to test your nollie power.

We can dork around on this thing for a few minutes if you feel like it.

And then we'll head to this spot. I'm pretty sure my friend Brandon broke this thing in, so thank him for making this skateable.

This spot isn't for the weak of heart, but if you want to throw some rails on your board and go for broke I'd love to watch somebody try to tackle this thing. It's kind of hard to tell from this angle, but this ledge starts out only about knee high (two cinder blocks high) and ends up being about shoulder height (six cinder blocks high with a drop).

There's a super crusty bank at the bottom of the ledge that you could land on if you wanted to get really gnarly. Or you could just blast past the bank and land on the sidewalk. I'm personally too scared to even roll down the little bank onto the sidewalk so I won't pass judgement.

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Then over to this thing.

Ollie the rail. Kids love this stuff.

You might remember this thing from Nate Broussard's Wizards of Radical video part. If not, refresh your memory (at 0:58). Six years later this thing's still here just waiting for you to blast off of it.

I thought we'd end the tour at the micro-ditch in the field.

Photo by Shaun Mefford

I'm sure you remember this spot from when I reviewed it in Thrasher magazine, right? No? Well, it happened anyway.

So let me know if you're interested in taking the tour. I'm thinking an hourly rate of $300 sounds pretty fair. Or we could work out a micro-package deal if you're only interested in visiting specific spots on the tour. Filming is allowed but if you want to bring along a photographer you're going to have to purchase my photo-permit package which starts at $500 for 20 photos. There's obviously stipulations addressing limited usage for both the video content and the photo documentation. Group discounts are available. Children under 18 will need to have a signed waiver from their parents as well as a high tolerance for an old dude who can barely ride a skateboard. See you soon.

Previously - Trash Can Omelette

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