We Saw This: Morrissey
I've been excited about going to one of Morrissey's NY shows for so long, that by the time the night actually rolled around, my pleasure delirium wrapped around me like an Englishman's cable-knit sweater and I had to struggle to be present in the moment. As I was standing there, in the back of a sea of thick necked dudes, engulfed in a warm fog of taco farts (MORE ON THIS LATER) I had to keep reminding myself to pay attention and enjoy the songs being performed, rather than just repeat "COUNT DOWN TO NIPPLES" over and over in my mind.
I guess I didn't realize how much grown manly men like Morrissey, but they literally made up the whole audience. The friend that I went to the show with told me that it's because Morrissey is macho, and although I can see him and realize that he's a large-framed man who could hit you in the face with a brick if he wanted to, I don't really see him wanting to, because he's probably too busy calling people "lads" and brushing up on his Oscar Wilde trivia. As someone who may or may not have "Oscar" carved in their arm somewhere, spanning back from high school cutter moments, I can relate to that last part.
Touching briefly on the fact that Terminal 5 is the worst possible place to ever see an anything, and the fact that it was packed beyond packed for the Saturday show that we went to, everyone pretty much kept their cool and behaved themselves, at least towards the back where we were standing. At one point these two younger girls elbowed past my friend and I, for basically no reason because they only ended up an inch or two ahead of us in the meat wall, but we were only annoyed by it for five seconds as it was a minor infraction. What wasn't a minor infraction, is the fact that, oh, about 89 percent of the crowd was farting their face off for the whole show. Did anyone else experience this? I mean, for whatever reason hour two of any show always starts smelling like Taco Bell craps, so that's no surprise there, but this was something that seemed almost planned and intentional, like maybe someone was dropping stink bombs from the balcony?
At 12:56AM, after we left the show, I received the following text:
"I am with someone who went to the Morrissey show and said that the guy he was with farted so bad that fights almost broke out. He was the source of the fart!"
When I read this, I felt a feeling of fear, but I'm not sure why.
Aside from the mystery that we just walked each other through, my favorite parts of the show were the bleak as shit "Meat is Murder" moment, and when Morrissey picked up an effeminate boy from the crowd, and held him like a football for almost a whole song.
Shoplifters Of The World Unite / You're The One For Me, Fatty / The Youngest Was The Most Loved / I'm Throwing My Arms Around Paris / One Day Goodbye Will Be Farewell / Scandinavia / Ouija Board, Ouija Board / Black Cloud / Everyday Is Like Sunday / To Give (The Reason I Live) / You Have Killed Me / Spring-Heeled Jim / I Know It's Over / Let Me Kiss You / Maladjusted / Speedway / Meat Is Murder / I Will See You In Far Off Places // Still Ill
Pictures via Christian Montone