Celebrating my 40th birthday on a tropical island with a sexy stranger sounded great – until I realised I would almost certainly look like an idiot on national television.
My friends and I over-consumed the park and its artificial pleasures, often forgetting the outside world was a far cry from all that.
Although I left the LDS years ago, I went to the church's recent Hill Cumorah Pageant, a flashy spectacle designed to tell the origin story of Mormonism and convert new members.
Less MDMA and sangria; more prim and proper right-wing children with stoner parents.
"I'm sure that everyone who is working away in an office, enviously looking at my Facebook albums, could live the exact same life. I don't understand why more people don't do what I do."
Tourists and urban explorers are going crazy over haunting tours of the radioactive site.
They're so poor and so sex-crazed that they just wait till they get home and sort it out on the NHS.
We went down to Catemaco, Mexico – the Disneyland of satanic tourists – to check out all the chicken killing, voodoo dolls, and spirit possessions the town had to offer.
Despite what some researchers call the "Jaws effect", sharks aren't actually as dangerous as people think. Shark diving lets people see it for themselves.
We had a walk down the strip and asked people why they got the tattoos they got.
This weekend getaway featured a two-headed goose, a guy dressed up as a sexy goat and some light chanting.
I came to see lights. Instead I only saw clouds and disappointed people on a windy beach. So I asked them why they'd come.
"I've seen everything from gangland turf wars to drunken fools thinking they can take on seven-foot-tall bouncers."
But also a great day out if you want to be reminded that you can be vaporised in a matter of seconds.
In the last two decades NASA reported nearly 600 exploding meteorites, many as large as 18 meters, rattling the thermosphere like dynamite. Is anyone worried about that?
A critical ingredient in concrete, glass and microchips, sand is a hot commodity – and in Morocco, illegal extraction costs the government $1.1 billion in unpaid taxes.
For more than a century, the Maasai have been corralled into smaller and smaller pieces of land in order to conserve the environment and precious animals – and to make room for deluxe suites and armies of tourists.
I asked a couple of experts just how polluted the Romanian coastline is.
Locals feel the recent influx of tourists is starting to change the city, from shops catering to visitors rather than residents, to naked Italians and drunk men dressed as bananas passed out in the streets.
Playing Ludo and cooking coke in the Colombian town of San Augustin.
Some view it as their savior, others as a project that will hasten their demise.
A Vipassana is a silent prison that you enter of your own free will. You can't talk, read, use your phone, or masturbate, until you've finished ten days of meditating for ten hours each day.
During the so-called "Secret War", the US dropped more than 2 million tons of ordnance on Laos, equivalent to a planeload of bombs every eight minutes, 24 hours a day, for nine years.