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PRETTY GIRL BULLSHIT

  • 'Too Pretty to Work' Laura Fernee Is a Mirror to Our Own Stupidity

    Welcome to part 3,456 of the age-old tabloid morality sham. Full story

    2013 May 20 Bertie Brandes Stuff
    5
    8
  • Twitter Thinks Angelina Jolie Is Nothing without Breasts

    It's really, really depressing. Full story

    2013 May 15 Bertie Brandes Stuff
    5
    8
  • Things That Hollywood Thinks Are 'Punk'

    The launch of "Punk Couture" at the Met was a perfect example of how pathetic everything in the world is right now. Full story

    2013 May 9 Bertie Brandes Fashion
    5
    8
  • A Basic Guide to Existing in Summer

    Let's fill the streets with beautiful unemployed people in bikinis. Full story

    2013 May 2 Bertie Brandes Stuff
    5
    8
  • This Woman Is Telling Lies to Vaginas

    Pam Stenzel's sermons about abstinence are entirely idiotic. Full story

    2013 Apr 24 Bertie Brandes Stuff
    5
    8
  • Is Snapchat Ruining People's Lives?

    I'm worried that it is. Full story

    2013 Apr 16 Bertie Brandes Tech
    5
    8
  • Come Back and Claim Thatcher's Throne, Louise Mensch

    It's time you stopped going nuts in New York and did what you were born to do. Full story

    2013 Apr 11 Bertie Brandes Stuff
    5
    8
  • Gillette Want Men to Shave So They Can Get Laid

    It's an attack on the dignity of women everywhere. Full story

    2013 Apr 3 Bertie Brandes Stuff
    5
    8
  • A Whole Year of Pretty Girl Bullshit

    Samantha Brick, Todd Akin, Taylor, Cara – this one goes out to you and all the others who made it possible. Full story

    2013 Mar 27 Bertie Brandes Stuff
    5
    8
  • This Woman Who Hates Women Just Made My Day

    The hateful madness of Claire Khaw says some pretty positive things about Britain today. Full story

    2013 Mar 21 Bertie Brandes Stuff
    5
    8
  • Why Do Nice Guys Always Finish Last?

    Here's a crazy notion: maybe they don't. Full story

    2013 Mar 14 Bertie Brandes Stuff
    5
    8
  • The Pretty Girl's Swearword Bible 2013

    The dirty words you are – and are not – allowed to say. Full story

    2013 Mar 6 Bertie Brandes Stuff
    5
    8
  • Oh No, Louise Mensch Has Started Writing a 'Feminist' Fashion Blog

    What is she doing, trying to put me out of a job? Full story

    2013 Feb 26 Bertie Brandes Stuff
    5
    8
  • Dubai Fashion Week Sounds Like the Worst Show On Earth

    The sons and daughters of oil sheikhs paying Katy Perry to look at their shitty clothes? NFM. Full story

    2013 Feb 20 Bertie Brandes Fashion
    5
    8
  • It's Time to Declare War On the Thigh Gap

    It's the cleavage of the tumblr age, and it fucking sucks. Full story

    2013 Feb 12 Bertie Brandes Stuff
    5
    8
  • Justin Bieber's Mum Is Freaking Me Out

    Is her new anti-abortion film brainwashing the voters of tomorrow? Full story

    2013 Feb 6 Bertie Brandes Stuff
    5
    8
  • Please Don't Make Me Hate Women, Huffington Post

    We aren't all obsessed with donuts and fucking Ryan Gosling. Full story

    2013 Jan 30 Bertie Brandes Stuff
    5
    8
  • An Open Letter to Anyone Thinking of Getting Their Labia Sliced Off

    Don't let the world make you feel so damn unpretty. Full story

    2013 Jan 24 Bertie Brandes Stuff
    5
    8
  • Why Can't Anybody Love Tom Cruise?

    An open letter to the most undesirable man in Hollywood. Full story

    2013 Jan 15 Bertie Brandes Stuff
    5
    8
  • There's a Feminist Propaganda War

    And it's already claimed Katy Perry. Full story

    2013 Jan 9 Bertie Brandes Stuff
    5
    8
  • Apparently Adam Lanza Was Angry About Abortions

    Or so says Victoria Jackson, the confused American televangelist preaching the Lord's word. Full story

    2012 Dec 19 Bertie Brandes Stuff
    5
    8
  • White Girl Apathy Is Killing Culture

    Taylor Swift and feminism have turned pretty girls into apathetic idiots. Full story

    2012 Dec 12 Bertie Brandes Stuff
    5
    8
  • Why the Hell Would a Woman Want to Become a Bishop Anyway?

    Those hats are totally heinous. Full story

    2012 Nov 28 Bertie Brandes Stuff
    5
    8
  • 63 Percent of Girls Want to Show You Their Nipples

    We conducted our own study into the shocking truth of womanhood circa 2012. Full story

    2012 Nov 20 Bertie Brandes Stuff
    5
    8
  • Stupid Little Shitty Biscuits of Patriarchal Oppression

    The Easy-Bake Oven is a small microwave powerful enough to turn every Pretty Girl into a fat bullshitter. Full story

    2012 Nov 14 Bertie Brandes Stuff
    5
    8
  • Why Are All My Teen Idols Voting for Romney?

    I'm like, freaking out over here. Full story

    2012 Nov 6 Bertie Brandes Stuff
    5
    8
  • We Should All Be More Like Britney

    You can't airbrush insanity. Full story

    2012 Oct 30 Bertie Brandes Stuff
    5
    8
  • Why Female Bonding Sucks

    Shopping and dieting are conspiracies to make all pretty girls hate each other. Full story

    2012 Oct 23 Bertie Brandes Stuff
    5
    8
  • Which 'Made In Chelsea' Cast Member Is the Biggest Feminist?

    It's really, really important that we find out. Full story

    2012 Oct 16 Bertie Brandes Stuff
    5
    8
  • Caitlin Moran and Eve Barlow Are Giving Girls a Bad Name

    Lena Dunham's probably not racist, but that doesn't mean racism doesn't exist. Full story

    2012 Oct 9 Bertie Brandes Stuff
    5
    8
  • Shut Up and Be Cute

    It's the only way you're going to get laid. Full story

    2012 Oct 2 Bertie Brandes Stuff
    5
    8
  • Ten Reasons Why... the 'Why Men Cheat' Video Is Annoying

    Emily Hartridge, your video is not funny, but you're kind of a joke. Full story

    2012 Sep 26 Bertie Brandes Stuff
    5
    8
  • Boys Don't Think You're Gross

    So why do girls keep concocting stupid reasons not to have sex? Full story

    2012 Sep 12 Bertie Brandes Stuff
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  • An Open Letter to Jack Tweed

    Y'know, that guy who beat up a 16-year-old with a golf club, dodged rape accusations and starred in 'Big Brother'. Full story

    2012 Sep 4 Bertie Brandes Stuff
    5
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  • The 'Semen Makes You Happy' Myth

    The Sun reckons it's just like Yakult, but comes out of boys' penises. Full story

    2012 Aug 23 Bertie Brandes Stuff
    5
    8
  • I'm in Love with Aliya Mustafina!

    And the teenage Russian gymnast's sad, sad eyes. Full story

    2012 Aug 7 Bertie Brandes Stuff
    5
    8
  • How to Make Your Crush Crush On You

    Pretty girls can be sex creeps, too. Full story

    2012 Aug 1 Bertie Brandes Stuff
    5
    8
  • My Boyfriend Was a Hypno-Freak

    How to avoid getting caught in a mind trap by a muttering psychopath with terrible shoes. Full story

    2012 Jul 26 Bertie Brandes Stuff
    5
    8
  • The 'Men Are Redundant' Myth

    Hey, big, strong men of the world: Don't worry, us girls aren't trying to ruin you. Full story

    2012 Jul 19 Bertie Brandes Stuff
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    8
  • The 'Nothing Tastes as Good as Skinny Feels' Myth

    Welcome to the world of Skinny Gossip, home of skinny bitches. Full story

    2012 Jul 12 Bertie Brandes Stuff
    5
    8
  • Touching Ladies for Christ

    When Pretty Girls go to evangelical church, everybody wants to save their soul. Full story

    2012 Jun 27 Bertie Brandes Stuff
    5
    8
  • The ‘Engagement Chicken’ Myth

    I followed Glamour's roast chicken recipe to try to trick my man into marriage. Full story

    2012 Jun 22 Bertie Brandes Stuff
    5
    8
  • The Pill Myth

    Do they really give you big boobs and insanity? Full story

    2012 Jun 8 Bertie Brandes Stuff
    5
    8
  • All the Pretty Girls Will Be Dancing on Thursday Night

    At the launch of the third issue of The Mushpit. Full story

    2012 May 29 Bertie Brandes Stuff
    5
    8
  • The 'Green-Eyed Monster' Myth

    Why is jealousy such a girl thing? Full story

    2012 May 25 Bertie Brandes Stuff
    5
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  • The ‘Bikini Line’ Myth

    I asked some males what a Pretty Girl's vagina should be wearing. Full story

    2012 May 14 Bertie Brandes Stuff
    5
    8
  • Getting to Grips With FHM’s Sexy 100

    Why do we need such a list? It's making my oil-covered breasts ache. Full story

    2012 May 3 Bertie Brandes Stuff
    5
    8
  • Sex Tips for Girls (Are Weird, Aren't They?)

    Why do Cosmo want me to tourniquet my boyfriend's dick at a dinner party? Full story

    2012 Apr 27 Bertie Brandes Stuff
    5
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  • Help Us Find This Pretty Girl's Wallet

    And reap the glorious rewards. Full story

    2012 Apr 20 VICE Staff Stuff
    5
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  • Sex Pest 101

    Our resident pretty girl has some words of advice for all you lotharios out there. Full story

    2012 Apr 20 Bertie Brandes Stuff
    5
    8
  • The Full Moon Myth

    Are all pretty girls really lunatics? Full story

    2012 Apr 13 Bertie Brandes Stuff
    5
    8
  • Ten Important and Obvious Things You Should Already Know

    I just want all us pretty girls to be on the same page. Full story

    2012 Apr 5 Bertie Brandes Stuff
    5
    8
  • Hello and Thank You for Cumming

    I went to a BYOB masturbation seminar and learned nothing. Full story

    2012 Mar 28 Bertie Brandes Stuff
    5
    8
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  • Top Stories
  • Latest
  • Most Popular
  • What Does Terrorism Mean in 2013?

    It's a difficult word to define, according to Glenn Greenwald.

  • Murderous Fanatics and EDL Idiots Brought Darkness to Woolwich Yesterday

    We spent the day there trying to make sense of it all.

  • Cry-Baby of the Week

    This week: Some kids got arrested for a water balloon fight and a guy is suing Taco Bell for stealing his ideas.

  • VICE News: Triple Hate

    Memphis City Council, the Klan and the Crips.

  • VICE News: Sisa: Cocaine of the Poor

    A new drug called sisa is tearing its way through Athens' poor.

  • My Week Spent with Hungary's Far-Right

    Hungarian nationalists throw beer at people and blame Jews and gypsies for all their problems.

  • American Teens Are Being Trapped in Abusive 'Drug Rehab Centres'

    How an anti-drug cult from the 60s has evolved into an abusive, billion-dollar “teen rehab” industry.

  • Is Tabloid Outrage Just Getting More People into Legal Highs?

    Getting uppity about internet drugs seems kind of pointless if all you're doing is advertising them.

  • We Photographed a Drunk EDL Hate Mob Attacking Police Last Night

    They went there to spread Islamophobia and achieved absolutely nothing.

  • Rave and Hardcore YouTube Comments Will Restore Your Faith in Humanity

    They're genuinely some of the most beautiful things I've ever read.

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  • Facebook and Censorship's Slippery Slope

    You're not in America when you're on Facebook – you're on the internet.

  • We Spoke to a Former Crack Addict About Rob Ford

    "People don’t decide to have a glass of wine with dinner and then go buy a bag of crack."

  • VICE on HBO Outtakes: Kicking Heroin with an Ibogaine Ceremony

    Many swear it's the most effective way to kick heroin addiction.

  • Fringes: Stories from the Edge: Deportee Purgatory

    Tijuana’s El Bordo is home to thousands of heroin-addicted Mexican deportees.

  • VICE News: Triple Hate

    A doc about Nathan Bedford Forrest, the Memphis City Council, the Klan, and the Crips.

  • The Creators Project: Turning CCTV Footage into Art

    An invasion of privacy and erosion of our civil liberties can serve as a source for art.

  • We Watched the Stockholm Suburbs Burn

    But was it really a riot, or just a coupe of bored arsonists?

  • Fashion Tidbits Roundup: David Bowie, Glitter and Topless Abercrombie Models

    These are things you should know about, this week.

  • Photo Dump Vol. 120

    More stupid pictures we found on the stupid internet.

  • Milf Teeth: In Ibiza with Endless House

    Maybe I'm an old raver now, too.

  • In Search of Tim Dog, the Rapper Turned Con Artist who Probably Faked His Own Death

    We spoke to several people close to him who think he's alive, and after some digging, we think so, too.

  • Speaking with Adam Kokesh, Before He Was Detained by the Feds

    This would be the first in a series of controversies surrounding Adam and his politics.

  • George's Fun Happy Place

    George has a lot of problems to overcome, but he's capable of an incredible lightness.

  • Cry-Baby of the Week

    This week: Some kids got arrested for a water balloon fight and a guy is suing Taco Bell for stealing his ideas.

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  • This Man Thinks He Never Has to Eat Again

    Rob Rhinehart's vomit-coloured cocktail could change food forever.

  • Alex Miller's New Column: Lord, I Hate Camden Town

    It's the graveyard of the fad.

  • How to Be Happy, Young and Jobless

    A survival guide for when society thinks your life has no purpose.

  • Milf Teeth: The Notches On Your Bedpost Don't Mean Shit

    Your sex gets better when you're learning with one person.

  • I Interviewed My Local UKIP Rep After I Got Him Sacked and Banned

    Phillip Collins has been reinstated now, but things were still a bit awkward.

  • What's Going to Kill the House Revival?

    Geeks? Shufflers? Americans? Tinchy Stryder?

  • Pretty Girl Bullshit: Is Snapchat Ruining People's Lives?

    I'm worried that it is.

  • VICE News: Protest At Thatcher's Funeral

    Some people enjoy booing coffins. We went to see just how many.

  • A Big Night Out... at the Worst Club Night Ever?

    The "stars" from TOWIE and Milton Keynes, together at last.

  • Thatcher's War on Acid House

    She may have got the Falklands, but she couldn't get the pillheads.

  • English Fascists Took Their First Beating of the Summer in Brighton This Weekend

    That's what happens when bigots march in England's most liberal city.

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    Kicking Heroin with an Ibogaine Ceremony

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