This Frat Boy Has Some Tips On How to Get Away with Rape
The coed dorm at Miami University, Ohio where the rape-tips flyer was handed out.
I'm really starting to dislike being a man. I mean, I dig things that men tend to dig – girls, drinking beer, pretending my car is better than it is – but I think I'm entering a new stage of disappointment with our gender; one in which my dick is constantly shamed into flaccidity, forcing my balls to actively climb up inside my body in the hope that people will think I'm just a really ugly, hairy member of the fairer sex.
The latest blow to the reputation of the male race comes from the confusingly-named Miami University in Ohio, where some frat boys circulated flyers that gave students tips on how to get away with rape.
Highlights include "Wear protection", which, written as bluntly as it is, almost seems likes comedic genius in context with other pointers like "If your [sic] afraid the girl will identify you slit her throat". Which is kinda horrific, but more just horrifically embarrassing given that it's obviously someone's idea of a joke and it's roughly as funny as infanticide.
I didn't realise that the moronic, seemingly-unbelievable bro-culture you laugh at in movies had actually spilled over into real life like this. You make rape jokes when you're a 13-year-old virgin, not when you're college-age and pretty well stuck into the process of becoming a Well-Rounded Adult. So I spoke to a student who goes to Miami University to see what was up.
VICE: Hey, Anonymous Student. Where did this flyer come from?
Anonymous Student: Some freshman guy posted it on the guys' floor in McBride hall, which is a coed freshman dorm. He put it up a couple of weeks ago on a bathroom door. Someone reported it and the university didn't really take any action towards punishing him, which is what brought all the national attention towards us.
Yeah, it's been pretty widely reported. How long did it take for the media to pick up on it?
It was only up for a few hours before it was reported, but it was kept on the quiet until a group called Wave [Woman Against Violence and Sexual Assault] found out. They were upset that more hadn’t been done about it, which brought more attention to all of us. They’ve been pretty avid about it since.
What was the initial reaction from everyone around campus? Did people find it funny or were they pissed off?
A lot of people were really offended. In fact, I haven’t talked to one male or female who wasn’t. Guys were mad that this guy made us all look bad and girls were even more scared to walk home at night. There’s been 29 reported rapes here since 2009 and this flyer really just made that stat flourish. But we all have real pride in our school and this flyer getting national attention gives Miami a bad rep, which upsets us all. We're much better than that. Everyone could tell it was a joke, but it still looks bad. Plus, the kid has terrible grammar.
Yeah, the grammar sucks. I can't find the statistics for the UK, but 29 seems like a lot of rapes to me. Did people get that it was satire?
We all saw the satire, especially the guys. Maybe it can be a joke between one or two friends, but posting it in front of everyone is completely wrong.
Do you know what’s happening to the guy involved?
No, we haven’t heard. I’m sure we'll find out eventually, but they haven’t told us anything yet.
Everyone likes a good joke. Some people even like a good rape joke. But nobody likes a rape without the joke, so please stop doing this kind of shit before I feel the need to cut my dick off. I'd quite like to keep my dick and I'd very much like to get laid, both of which are going to get a lot harder if you don't stop being total douchebags and giving us all a bad name.
Follow Ryan on Twitter: @ryanbassil
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