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At the same time, Germany, and Berlin in particular, feels like home—from the acidic smell of the underground to the Prussian faith in bureaucratic rationality. And living in this society for some time has impacted the way I see the world, as well as my emotional attachment to certain parts of it.It's interesting that terms like "doing your bit" and "digging in" hark back to the process of rebuilding nations broken by the Second World War—the lasting moment when Europe united against the threat of fascism, something indelibly connected to what's known in Germany as "Nationalstolz." The idea of patriotism was a key selling point for the Leave campaign, but is actually still somewhat taboo in Germany. For example, some Germans felt pangs of guilt as they put seven goals past Brazil in the World Cup (in their own country) and recently a group of anti-fascist lads in Leipzig held a competition to steal as much German fan merchandise as possible, during the current European Championship. The group ended up burning a pile of nylon flags after midnight in a park. After living in a country like that for over a decade, you start to think differently about national pride.Faced with that question of going back, British expats have to consider the possibility of returning to a country that's become a failed outcast, no longer part of a strong economic union that also grapples with the ambitious concept of working together to make a decent life for the people in that union, with the world at large. As a British expat in the EU it doesn't feel great, knowing that we're the ones who made that dream for Europe look like a naive ideal.Living in Berlin with my Italian wife and our seven-month-old, I'm starting to think very differently about national pride and the meaning of Europe. I don't feel a duty to Britain, despite feeling terrible about the vote. Instead I feel a duty to foster a much broader sense of belonging in future generations, rather than leave them with a legacy of exclusion.Follow Tom Littlewood on Twitter.Faced with that question of going back, British expats have to consider the possibility of returning to a country that's become an outcast.