Sutton's apocalypticananza fun house!
In an amazingly forward-thinking move, Sutton Council have built a huge, hi-tech training facility for kids. The Life Centre will include an indoor street where youngsters can practice joining street gangs, buying drugs, and crossing roads. Another facility at the centre is a computer room where kids can practice dawdling on chat rooms and cyber bonding so that they will be adept at such tasks when the time comes for them to be groomed by hairy-palmed perverts. In a final coup de grace, the centre will traumatise any youngsters who fail to get good at street crime by sitting them in a small room and exploding televisions at them. This will illustrate to them just how they will die once their soon-to-be-unemployed parents fail to maintain household electronic bills because sonny-boy hasn't been pitching in. Fun times. Book your tickets to Sutton's Apocalypticananza Fun House now!
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