The Best of VICE This Week

By VICE Staff

It's the weekend (nearly)!! Here's a round up of the week's best, to distract you until it's really here.

WARREN ELLIS SAYS DELETE EVERYTHING NOW

In the future, Mickey Mouse will know when you're fucking the wrong man.

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HOW TO LIVE IN BRITAIN WITHOUT GETTING YOUR AMERICAN HEAD KICKED IN

A survival guide for anyone who calls trousers "pants".

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63 PERCENT OF GIRLS WANT TO SHOW YOU THEIR NIPPLES

And 92 percent of them want to marry Chris Brown. Apparently.

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VENICE BEACH IS A PARADISE

If Los Angeles is the place where young starlets' dreams go to die, Venice Beach seems to be the neighbourhood where the nightmares of old curmudgeons come to life.

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I'M IN A HIP ELECTRONICA BAND AND I DON'T KNOW WHY

Harry Cheadle's misguided attempts to become a rock star

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I'M SO SICK OF THESE HIPSTER TROMBONISTS

Since when did anybody play the trombone ironically?

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PLANES, FLAMES AND BANGS FROM THE SKY

"On the ground" in Gaza is a difficult place to be, when death keeps falling from the sky.

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THE BIG GULP: MY FIRST TIME SWALLOWING

Learning how to swallow without being a brat.

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I LEARNED HOW TO MAKE BLOW IN COLOMBIA



And I never want to see shitty NYC cocaine again.

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ASSAD BOMBED THE DAR AL SHIFA HOSPITAL



His MIG jets turned it to rubble.

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LONDON'S 2012 STUDENT DEMO WAS A WASHOUT



They screamed their rage at Big Ben, but Big Ben didn't wanna listen.

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HAVE CARTOONS LEGITIMISED PAEDOPHILIA IN JAPAN?



The age of consent in Japan is 13, which is creepy. These cartoon's make it creepier.

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I'M SENDING FOUR PEOPLE TO MARS FOR THE REST OF THEIR LIVES

Some Dutch guy wants to send you to Mars. Forever.

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