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Toast The Royal Wedding With Vice Tonight

By Vice Staff

Tonight, at The Haggerston on Kingsland Road, VBS' latest installment of the Rule Britannia series, Royal Wedding, premieres. It's full of porn stars, militant Islamists, anarchists, Arthurian skinheads and nice old women who love tea cups. You can watch the trailer down there.

Royal Wedding tells the story of the peripheral figures of the British landscape who, for one reason or another, are obsessed with Prince William and Kate Middleton’s upcoming marriage.

We meet the anarchists who are building huge medieval phalluses, muppet guillotines and plan on having a “right royal orgy” in the path of the procession in order to appease pagan fertility gods and bless the couple with heirs. Founding fathers of the EDL banished to Malta who see the wedding as the beginning of a new Crusades against Islam. Republicans looking to topple the government, radical Muslims warning of terrorist attacks and planning on burning flags, and pornographers, shooting a high-budget bunga-bunga party with Royal Family lookalikes.

Tonight's screening is from 7.30 till 8.00, but theses things tend to fill up, so turn up early.

MORE IMPORTANT NEWS: the film premieres for the rest of the globe tomorrow on VBS.TV.