What Sort of Person Likes George Osborne?

By Jack Hammer

This morning, the Chancellor of the Exchequer George Osborne decided to join Twitter. In case you haven't seen it already, here's his first (pretty innocuous) tweet:

And here's a selection of the replies he received:

I don't know why the most despised man in the Tory party chose the morning of his budget announcement to step into what is essentially the world's biggest liberal coffee shop, but he already has more than 19,000 followers, so I guess he's at least allowing everyone to get their jokes about him looking like mashed potato off their chests before he shafts them in two hours' time.

Obviously, his arrival prompted a bunch of people angry about Workfare, tax breaks for the rich, benefits cuts and the Bullingdon Club to hurl the same insults at him over and over again. The dumbest of these seems to revolve around the idea that by "messing around on Twitter" he is wasting time that could be better spent saving the economy, ignoring the fact that a) tweets generally take about 30 seconds to compose, b) this one was probably composed by a Tory media aide, anyway, and d) HE SENT ONE TWEET.

It's not just the liberals who are on his back either, but I guess when you've been booed by thousands of people at an event as resolutely positive as the Paralympic Games, being called an "incompetent eton fagot" by an IT engineer from Barnsley is water off a duck's back.

But what about that other section of Twitter? The one that, y'know, actually kinda likes George Osborne and wouldn't sneer at him if he passed them in the street?

I was interested to find out exactly who these people were, so I looked through the thousands of replies sent to George Osborne's first tweet this morning. I found five people who seemed to be saying something positive and then checked out their tweeting history to see what other shit they like.

Daniel Lunness likes:
– curry
– free beer
– the hashtag #OneForTheLad
– the hashtag #StopTheThugObama
– the hashtag #ChampagneSocialist
– the campaign for British sovereignty in the Falkland Islands
– complaining about Justin Bieber being on the news
– the TV personality Jeremy Clarkson
– the wrestler Chris Jericho
– jokes about Thatcher

Chris likes:
– the TV series Buffy The Vampire Slayer
– bike rides in the sun
– complaining about people drinking alcohol on trains
– the Queen
– "abandoned places"
– Bond films
– the Titanic II
– singing along to the German synthpop band Alphaville; best known for their hit "Forever Young"
– Comic Relief

DBA likes:
– Irish folk music
– the recording artist, KD Lang
– the actress, Milla Jovovich
– the actress, Lindsay Lohan
– the books of William Hague
– Pot Noodle

Vonny Watts likes:
– Diet Coke
– the campaign for sovereignty in the Falklands
– World Book Day
– Making jokes about Vince Cable
– the singer, Beyonce
– the MP, Justine Greening
– the rower, James Cracknell
– haranguing whoever runs the UKIP Twitter for their poor grammar
– wine
– cats

Maria-Rebecca Murphy likes:
– tweeting "AWWWWW" when she sees David Cameron
– tweeting "Awwwww Dave <3" when she sees David Cameron
– tweeting "Awwww DC is such a babe!"
worrying about David Cameron getting shot when he goes to Libya
– the singer, Olly Murs
– the book and film series, Harry Potter
– the "royal baby"
– Black Eyed Peas

So there you go. To be honest, I have no idea what we're supposed to learn from those findings, other than that everyone just really fucking hates George Osborne and that this guy spends more time than he should in public toilets. There will be something weightier in response to the budget on VICE later today.


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