• Contemplating the Heavens with VHK's Atilla Grandpierre

    Decked out in robes and war paint, Atilla howls with profound fury and joy while whipping himself into a shamanistic frenzy. Comparatively speaking, his shamanic punk band VHK makes Gogol Bordello seem about as intense as a middle-school production of Fiddler on the Roof.

  • Live Skull, Dead Body

    Seeing as all of their songs on Spotify have a little "less than 1000 plays" symbol next to them, chances are you haven’t listened to much Live Skull. They were the best of the New York no-wave psychos, and they've aged better than Hungarian dessert wine foot-stomped by gypsy sla…

  • Metal's Lost Survivalist Endeavors of the 1990s - Volume 1: Helloween

    It's common knowledge that several forms of metal weathered a serious beating at the hands of 90s alt-rock, with hair-metal forced into a well-deserved dirt-nap. The adaptive gestures executed by many of these bands constitutes a collective phenomenon I like to call "Metal’s Surv…

  • Vinyl and Ebay: A Fascinating Relationship (Volume Two)

    At some point last year, an acquaintance made me aware of RecordFlipper, a blog that aims to serve as an investment tip sheet for the release and future release of hyperlimited vinyl titles. I decided to interview one of the main flippers about it.

  • Best Musical Questions for the 21st Century—Kim Fowley Interviews Chris Darrow

    In this revelatory meeting of the minds: two visionaries converge as Kim Fowley quizzes longtime friend Chris Darrow providing a music history lesson and questions galore that run the gamut from Facebook, drug use, alcohol, and fast food.

  • Bringing in the String Section with Mars' Mark Cunningham

    Mars never made a bad album. In fact, during its fleeting, 36-month lifespan, the NYC no wave combo never made any kind of album.

  • The F***s to S***s Ratio

    Two give-a-shits strains the threshold of tolerability. Beyond two shits is technically mental illness. That’s where you care so much about what you’re doing, you can’t even handle being a human being. This is where you kick somebody’s teeth in for talking during your set when yo…

  • The Secret Sin of Mark Driscoll

    Here are the tracks which Mark Driscoll has been allowing to seep into his gel-soaked, faux-hawked-like-a-third-grader, hair, then down into his hard, NASA hard, skull.

  • Straight White Guys, Just Stop It

    How about this, if you had to sing the song you're thinking of covering in front of a group of non-white people would you feel comfortable, or uncomfortable?

  • Problematic Lyrics Within Ten Pop Songs

    Let us not forget that the junior high boys from ten years ago, the ones who commented at Suicide Girls forums and had a kind of sour smell to them, they, too, had a hard time swallowing Bright Eyes lyrics.

  • Rocking Your Jock: The Wide World of Sports and Where It Has Intersected With Music

    When it comes to pro sports, money doesn’t just “talk” anymore. It $hreds. It also yodel$, jam$, drops phat ba$$ and of course, $pit$ mad flow.

  • Defending Reggae to White People Who Don’t Like Reggae

    To not like reggae based on the five unassailable tenets of Reggae No Thank You is to do the world a disservice. And you've done that enough, Whitey.

  • The Theory of Rock Entropy

    Let’s say for the sake of still taking, that the Theory of Rock Entropy is something you’d be interested in hearing about. In this case, possible questions you’d have include "What the fuck is wrong with you?"

  • Dawn of the Dusk

    Interpol says they got a picture of a one year old child in a roasting pan like a piglet. Had an apple in his mouth and everything.

  • Vinyl and Ebay: A Fascinating Relationship

    Ok, so why did you open and handle the record with your big, fluid-gorged sausage fingers? Why can I see the record in your picture? Because you needed to check the color? Check this color, hoss (helps to visualize an extended middle digit right now).

  • Every Critic’s Dream

    Do you have a DJ night? You should have a DJ night. I would go to your DJ night just to hear all of the songs that you think are good because I bet I would think they’re good too. I would either dance to the songs or quietly and reverently listen to them.

  • Ignorance Is Bliss

    We could instead be… I don’t know, fucking? Yeah, that doesn’t take any knowledge of anything. Let’s all just fuck and pick our butts like a bunch of gross hairy beasts and stop pretending to be so smart, you guys.

  • Monoshock Reissue Kills Time Dead

    It’s a free country, and there’s no sweeter freedom than spending a little cash to almost not like something even though it’s the kind of thing you think is great.

  • History of the Rock Grunt

    Hey: how about when you're listening to rock music and the singer, instead of singing words, just lets out a real primal grunt? Isn't that the best? Yes, it is the best. What follows is a historical tour through some of Rock's Great Grunts.

  • Steve Miller's Account of Intercepting a Box of Records Addressed to His Son

    Fan Fiction based on inner dialogues of hilarious generational dissonance: legendary classic rock guitarist Steve Miller’s first-person account.

  • Bringing in the String Section with Michael Gira

    Michael Gira is not known for making tepid, lightweight albums. Swans exudes a superhuman intensity. Even the band's recent reunion has transcended expectations.

  • Recalibrating Your Opinions so the World Doesn’t Bother You

    Sometimes, thanks to the internet, it’s “fuk u idiot” instead of “LA LA LA LA LA,” but the idea is roughly the same. People dislike hearing things they don’t instantly agree with.

  • The Wheel of Punk Part Two

    The good news about The Wheel of Punk™ is we don’t have to decide who is more punk. We can just say “however punk you think The Ramones are, the Sex Pistols are equally punk and vice versa, only the Sex Pistols are on the ‘artier’ side of the circle and the Ramones are on the ‘du…

  • The Wheel of Punk

    This is what we've needed all along, a surefire way to determine what's punk, and what's more punk. Use codeword: BANANAS in the comments section for an added sense of intellectual superiority.

  • The Sad Cult of H.I.M.

    It's all Bam's fault.

  • AIDS? You Can Get Grunge From That

    It’s airtight. AIDS caused grunge.

  • I Broke Even Buying Records

    I’m the Ray fucking Allen of sandwich wrappers that are metaphors for records over here.

  • Attention Crybabies

    “I’m this thing, not THAT thing.” ET CETERA.

  • Regular Human Beings

    We just buy CDs at Target and play them in the car.

  • Co-MVPs of Time Wasting

    Baseball’s Rick Ankiel and GNOD.