SEX, DRUGS, AND ROCK 'N' ROLL
-
I Can't Fuck You All, Barbiturates, and Jay Arner
People mistake my sexual nature for a desire to have sex with them, or more accurately, somehow mistake my sexual openness with an expectation that I'll have sex with them. Not everyone of course. But the other day, someone was trying to fuck me whom I did not want to sleep with, and he quoted things to me I had written in this column. Full story
-
The Lipstick Vibrator, Crossing the Line, and Big Deal
I was ready to toss this vibrator under the abyss of my bed never to be seen again, until I realized the usefulness of such a covert vibe! Sometimes you have to masturbate in inappropriate places. I know boys secretly jerk it all the time at work, but girls can, too. Full story
-
Fake Vaginas, Ways to Take Heroin, and 1939 Ensemble
I hate to let you guys down, but I've never tried heroin. Unlike with sex toys, when it comes to drugs I can't exactly email a dealer and be like, “Yo! I'm writing about H this week, want to send me some free samples?” This is for the best because from what I've read about the wa… Full story
-
Medical Fetishism, Benzo Withdrawal, and the Swedish Avant-Garde
The more people I get to know (and I don't just mean that in the biblical sense), the more I learn that everyone is a pervert. Wave your freak flag high kids, we're all sexual deviants! If your porn search terms wouldn't give your grandmother a heart attack, then you're not doing… Full story
-
Nipples, Robo-Tripping, and Raleigh Moncrief
In this edition of Sex, Drugs, and Rock 'N' Roll, Sophie talks about the benefits of nipple abuse, how buying things sold at the grocery store to get high is lame, and how she'd call Raleigh Moncrief "Big Pappa" after farting in front of him. Full story
-
Not Sleeping with One-Night Stands, Rum, and Gay Reggae
In this edition of Sex, Drugs, and Rock 'N' Roll, Sophie goes over the awkwardness of sleeping with a one-night stand, and how it would be nice to have REAL gay-friendly reggae. Full story
-
Loads, Coffee, and Younolovebunny
In this edition of Sex, Drugs, and Rock 'n' Roll, Sophie goes over goo pride, how no one should care if coffee is bad for you or not, and sexy music. Full story
-
Fishy Crotch, LSD, and Rare Times
In this edition of Sex, Drugs, and Rock 'N' Roll, Sophie explains that vaginas are SUPPOSED to smell like fish, and that LSD should only be taken with people who don't suck. Full story
-
Vagina Eating, Ambien, and Renny Wilson
In this installment of Sex, Drugs, and Rock 'N' Roll, Sophie talks up the benefits of eating vagina when you have a vagina, and shares her first Ambien experience. Full story
-
Handjobs, Natural Stress Solutions, and Dumbo Gets Mad
In this installment of Sex, Drugs, and Rock 'N' Roll, Sophie reminds us all of the kindness behind the sympathy handjob, and goes over some natural stress remedies that aren't pot. Full story
-
Knife Play, DMT, and The Trail of Dead
The trick is to embrace your darkness rather than try and snuff it, or else it might bubble up and you'll find yourself etching the word "ALONE" into your thigh with a kitchen knife at 3AM after too much absinthe. Full story
-
Dildos, Benzos, and Astral Folk Pop
I've seen the Eiffel Tower at night, and I tell you, it's not as beautiful as a tattooed Asian chick wielding a giant dildo. Full story
-
Monogamy, Boliviana Negra, and Child Actor (the Band)
In this installment of Sex, Drugs, and Rock 'N' Roll, Sophie talks about unique takes on monogamy and bi-sexuality, Boliviana negra, and the band Child Actor. Full story
-
Semen Allergies, Xanax, and Date Rape
Having diarrhea in front of your partner is a big step in the relationship. I'd say it should come after you stop using condoms, but before you say l love you. Full story
-
Sex, Drugs, and Rock 'N' Roll - Butt Sniffers and Weed
In this installment of Sex, Drugs, and Rock 'N' Roll, Sophie talks about how butt sniffing is a normal way to show love and affection. Full story
-
Clitoral Gel and Coke
While the gentle stuff felt burning in a good way, the Max O burned in an "oh fuck do I need to get tested?" way. It felt like my pussy had smoked a menthol cigarette. Full story
-
Morning Wood and Pop Crushes
When I was a little kid I'd wake up at the crack of dawn ravenously hungry. I'd walk to the kitchen, secretly hoping to wake up my mom and fix myself Eggo waffles. Twenty years later I'm still an early riser with an appetite, but my cravings have evolved from Eggos to orgasms. Full story
-
Sexual Flavors and Candy Tripping
Covering the big topics: how to mask the fact that jizz is gross, fun drugs, and rappers who like white bitches and orgies. Normal. Full story
-
Sex, Drugs, and Rock 'N' Roll
A new column about everyone's three favorite things. Full story
-
Rob Ford, the World's Greatest Mayor, Smokes Crack
What's the big deal? Everyone finds themselves in this position once in a while.
-
Who’s Getting Rich off the Prison-Industrial Complex?
A rundown of some of America's incarceration investors.
-
Dodging Water Cannons and Sound Bombs at Israel's Catastrophe Day
The Israeli police force still isn't warming to Palestinian protesters.
-
Tubesteak: How to Hone Your Gaydar to Perfection
First and foremost, let me say that butch gay guys are the hottest men on Earth. Period.
-
Kai, the Hatchet-Wielding Hobo Wanted for Murder, Says He Was Drugged and Raped
A truly bizarre and tragic twist to the "homefree" tale.
-
Horrible People Are Exploiting Cambodia's Orphans
Unlicensed orphanages are stealing donations and trafficking children.
-
Bob Odenkirk’s Page: VICE Endorses Jipson Talmadge
Jipson Talmadge is VICE's choice for the next mayor of New York City.
-
Austerity's Drug of Choice
Greece's infamous new drug, sisa, is meth mixed with filler ingredients like battery acid.
-
“Fitch the Homeless” Is Backwards-Ass Activism
"Fitch the Homeless" is a great idea, until you think about it.
-
VICE News: This Is What Winning Looks Like
A documentary about the ineptitude and corruption of the Afghan security forces.
-
I Went Snooping Around Nicolas Cage's House
And it was kind of upsetting.
-
Weirdo Club
Things get weird when somebody breaks out the unholy fermented ichor.
-
Some Photographs from the All About Pets Show
Canada's largest pet convention has a lot to see, apparently.
-
Rat Tail: The Debut Single
Here is an excerpt from the liner notes of Rat Tail’s only album.
-
Meet the Malaysian Neo-Nazis Fighting for a Pure Malay Race
They realise that Nazis generally don't like Asian people, but apparently that doesn't matter.
-
Taji's Mahal: Shredding with Galen DeKemper
Galen DeKemper has been shredding New York City for the last decade.
-
A New Episode of Our TV Show Is Airing Tonight
Hanging with cigarette-smoking children in Indonesia and addicts kicking smack in Mexico.
-
Tubesteak: How to Hone Your Gaydar to Perfection
First and foremost, let me say that butch gay guys are the hottest men on Earth. Period.
-
Question of the Day: How Would You Feel if Your Mayor Smoked Crack?
"I would be surprised."
-
This Is Life in a 400-PPM World
It's gettin' hot in here, so take off all your clothes.
-
This Week in Racism: Former Italian Prime Minister Dressed up Strippers to Look Like Barack Obama
Who would think that's sexy?
-
The Mercy Rule: Hearing the Spurs
They're not too boring; you're too young.
-
Rob Ford, the World's Greatest Mayor, Smokes Crack
What's the big deal? Everyone finds themselves in this position once in a while.
-
Gangsta Boo Reviews Azealia Banks, MIA, Iggy Azalea, Brooke Candy, and More
I sat with her and watched some music videos by some of the hottest lady rappers out today.
-
A Few Impressions: 'Gatsby'
In the end, Luhrmann made it work, and that’s all that matters.
-
The Wizard of the Saddle Rides Again
The KKK protested renaming a park that memorialized one of the most infamous racists ever.
-
VICE News: This Is What Winning Looks Like
A documentary about the ineptitude and corruption of the Afghan security forces.
-
VICE on HBO Extended: Egypt on the Brink - Women Under Assault
VICE co-founder Suroosh Alvi meets with some local activists around Tahrir Square.
-
The Creators Project: Daft Punk's 'Random Access Memories' Collaborators: Paul Williams
As well as winning an Academy Award he was also nominated a number of times, most notably for his song from 'The Muppet Movie,' "The Rainbow Connection."
-
Art Talk: Matt Mignanelli
A chat about his work, life, and strong American work ethic.
-
VICE News: Sisa: Cocaine of the Poor
A new drug called sisa is tearing its way through Athens' poor.
-
Truckers in the Wild: Philadelphia
The brothers look for some uniquely Philly customs that have shaped the city’s character.
-
Bob Odenkirk’s Page: VICE Endorses Jipson Talmadge
Jipson Talmadge is VICE's choice for the next mayor of New York City.
-
Munchies: Hatos Bar
We all got suitably wasted before cooking up some barbecue.
-
Late Drone Age Civilization: The Fossil Record
Everyone wishes it would all be something else, but exactly what, nobody can say.
-
The Noisey Guide to French Rap
In America, we don’t pay attention to French rap.
-
If Julia Gillard is Such an Atheist, Where’s All the Gay Marriage?
Australians are Proud of Separating Church and State, but Don't go Far Enough.
-
Cry-Baby of the Week
This week: a guy who destroyed his neighborhood versus some guys who arrested a kid for mooning.
The Wizard of the Saddle Rides Again
The Dark Specter of History in Memphis 
Hung Like a Gastropod
The Rigors of a Snail-Genital Illustrator 
Austerity's Drug of Choice
Sisa Is Nasty Shit 
This Is What Winning Looks Like
Chaos and Corruption in Afghanistan 
The Fat Farms of Mauritania
Pack on Those Pounds, Ladies 
Jerks Are Exploiting Cambodia's Orphans
Get It Together, People 
