PRAYER ON PATROL

Some British inspector named Roger Bartlett's been catching criminals with the help of Jesus.

By JAMES TENAFLY

Wait, wait, wait: I wrote all that shit without actually reading the thing. Looks like Inspector Bartlett’s just another religious nut who thinks you can talk to God and, presto, instant gratification. Back when the crime detection rate in Devon and Cornwall, Bartlett’s beat, was at 26 percent, he asked his cops to pray for better numbers. According to Barlett, it worked like a charm. “Every quarter since, there has been an increase and now Barnstaple in Devon has a rate of just over 40 per cent.”

What’s terrible about stories like these is it makes all prayer look really, really, stupid, when it does have its place. As a practical, nuts-and-bolts kinda tool prayer’s pretty much garbage. It’s not going to help you nab criminals, or heal anyone, but it might just give you a better attitude. Just think of all those happy monks who spend all day repeating a mantra. It’s too bad the nutters ruin a nice thing every time they get their stinking, nut covered hands on one.

By JAMES TENAFLY 1 year ago

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