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Music

Listen to Rat Tail's '2 Butts 4 the Price of 1'

Check out the long-lost classic by the completely unknown white 80s hip-hop artist, Rat Tail, whose current whereabouts are unknown.

All photos by Janicza Bravo featuring Janicza Bravo as Blackie O and Hannah Hellar as Carmenita Rosenberg Miranda. Wardrobe provided by Arron Mendoza and Ben Phen at L.A.G. Vintage, 4557 Santa Monica Blvd., Los Angeles, California 90029

Below are the lyrics to the long-lost classic “2 Butts 4 the Price of 1,” by the completely unknown white 80s hip-hop artist, Rat Tail, whose current whereabouts are unknown. It was transcribed from a cassette tape discovered a year ago, wrapped in a ball of human hair in a garbage dump in Guadalajara, Mexico.

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Rat Tail can’t tell a lie, I’m addicted to butt.
And by “butt” you know I mean the big butt of a slut.
But what’s better than 1 butt? How aButt 2?
One butt for each of my nuts making ’em blueberry blue.
That’s 4 fly buns, 2 cracks down the back.
2 perfect buttholes make me nut in my slacks.
I’m going nuts for these butts on the rear of these freaks.
I’ll pay millions of bucks for just a peek of their cheeks.
My girls Blackie O and Carmenita got that tush.
2 booties in my face I’m yellin’ fuck that bush.
I don’t mean fuck that bush. I mean fuck that bush.
’Cause who the fuck needs bush when you got that tush?
Watch my dick go push. Make that tush go smush.
That’s the sound of a tush when my dick gives it a push.
And you know that Rat Tail is having twice the fun.
’Cause I’m fucking 2 butts 4 the price of 1.

2 butts 4 the price of 1.
Me and my jammy havin’ so much fun.
2 butts 4 the price of 1.
Worship the butts like I worship the sun.
2 butts make me just want to cum.
2 butts 4 the price of 1.

Put those butts in my face. On either side of my head.
Bounce those butts up and down on my dick till I’m dead.
Switch those butts back and forth. Every butt take a turn.
Twist around on my jammy and make that butt butter churn.
I guess my dick is the pipe and your butts are the crack.
I’d smoke those butts day and night till they turned my lungs black.
I’m seeing double, double bubble, and I’m praisin’ the Lord.
I’m a beast at this feast. It’s a smorgas-butt-bord.
1 tastes like salt. The other like sugarcane.
2 fat beautiful butts fucking melting my brain.
I can’t believe that the butt is where the shit comes from.
’Cause when I look at a butt it makes me just want to cum.
1 butt plus 1 more equals 2 as the sum.
1 butt for each of my hands, and I play ’em like drums.

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I’m runnin’ to buns till the day that I’m done.
Hey yo, I’m fucking 2 butts 4 the price of just 1.

2 butts 4 the price of 1.
Me and my jammy havin’ so much fun.
2 butts 4 the price of 1.
Worship the butts like I worship the sun.
2 butts make me just want to cum.
2 butts 4 the price of 1.

Up and down!
All around!
Up and down!
All around!
Up and down!
All around!

Jammy jam slammy slam
Slammy slam with my jam
Jammin’ all in these ma’ams
With my fat jammy jam
My jammy’s countin’ the butts
Then my jammy just slam
Yes, I’m slammin’ these ma’ams
With my fat jammy jam
I’m spreadin’ jam on these butts
With my jammy in hand
Take it out of my pants
And give it all to these ma’ams
Yeah, that’s me, Aaron Sam
With the fat jammy jam
2 butts 1 price
That’s how I’m fuckin’ these ma’ams

2 butts 4 the price of 1.
Me and my jammy havin’ so much fun.
2 butts 4 the price of 1.
Worship the butts like I worship the sun.
2 butts make me just want to cum.
2 butts 4 the price of 1.

VICE will be publishing the lyrics to one of Rat Tail’s masterpieces each issue for at least the next five months. Read them all and listen to Rat Tail’s sixth long-lost track, “We Shootin’ Hoops,” at VICE.com/rat-tail.