Brandon Jacobs Called My Friend a "Lil Watermelon Head Ass"
San Francisco 49ers running back Brandon Jacobs is somewhat of a bipolar socialite when it comes to interacting with fans and other members of society. One minute he’s parading around a bounce house with a six-year-old and then before you know it he’s viciously throwing his helmet into the stands. Basically, he acts the way anyone who was bigger, more muscular, and richer than almost anyone in the world would act. There was that one time he was part of a 30-car race down the New Jersey Turnpike, and that other time he said that Tom Brady’s wife Gisele Bundchen should stay cute and “shut up,” which some fans would argue deserves quite the under-the-table high five. He also told Rex Ryan that he would punch him in the face, and has dreams of becoming a boxing manager.
Now that the NFL season is underway, surely everyone is wondering when Jacobs’s next outrage will occur, a would-be first offense in the Niners' red and gold. Well, you’ll be happy to know that his latest controversial effort has already taken place, one which until now has mostly gone unseen. This recent outrage took place on (get ready to be shocked) Twitter, in the form of creative name-calling, directed at one of my buddies and old college roommates. Mind you, my 23 year old friend, Chauncey Tomlinson, is a Giants diehard and was never shy about expressing his admiration for Jacobs. He even works at MetLife Stadium. So he's a fan, though he was clearly fed up with Jacobs’ constant updates about his recent left knee injury. Chauncey tweeted the following to the former Giants powerhouse:
A bit confrontational, granted, but such is the world of sports fandom. Nobody wants to see an athlete complain. Surprisingly, Jacobs, no stranger to 140-character harassment, responded in his typical on-field fashion, which differs greatly from his bounce-house etiquette.
Hey, he called a fan "pussy" on a public forum! Pretty awesome, but shouldn't we expect more from our athletes when they engage in name calling? Fortunately, Jacobs wasn't satisfied with this initial response and stepped his insult game up just a few moments later:
That's what I'm talking about! "Watermelon head" is good, "Watermelon ass" is better, but "Watermelon head ass" is downright Joycean. To his credit, Jacobs was kind enough to provide a new nickname for Chauncey, free of charge. That took several minutes of analyzing Chauncey's profile picture. That's fan service right there. If Jacobs brings the same energy and commitment that he's showed in this response to the field this season, he's going to do his team proud.