Candid Camera

So it's your one-year anniversary and you decide to buy anal beads or treat your lover to a threesome with a Brazilian escort. Cocaine and raspberries followed by a little humpin', bumpin' and thumpin'. As the night progresses, you decide to capture the beauty of the moment on film. What a bish-bash! A few days later you pick up the developed photos. The cashier is a little weird, but you don't even really notice. After chortling at your naughtiness over chilled Chardonnay, you hide the snapshots behind the economics textbooks and move on with your life, secure in the knowledge that your most intimate moments are safe from prying eyes. But are they? Don't forget that lab technicians are people too. Even though the photos are printed by machines, the people who operate the machines have to see the photos to make sure that the color is balanced properly and stuff. When they see rolls with dirty pictures on them they instinctively rattle off another 3 copies of the roll so that the whole gang can have a laugh around the cooler at break-time. Next thing you know, those photos of your bachelor party where you are getting blowjobs from two zitty-assed hookers with rose tattoos are being passed around at parties and soon enough it gets featured in a slutty magazine like VICE. "Sparkle" (her photo lab name) is a mini-lab tech who has spent the past ten years amassing a fantastic collection of home-made filth. "I like the way these photos are shot so poorly with mistakes everywhere. They're so raw." Although getting porn developed at a regular photo center is a gray area that depends on the lab, according to Sparkle, the technician code of moral conduct is usually (unless there is evidence of pedophilia or hate crimes) to pretend that nothing was seen. Behind the scenes the employees all get "excited like five year-olds waiting for a red bike from Zeller's to see the people come pick up the dirty photos, but their act is to play it all non-chalant and laissez-faire. I would never have photos like this taken of myself cuz I know what people will do with them at development places. They're gonna use them for personal reasons, like to laugh at or masturbate to."