Cry-Baby #1: Barry Swegle
The incident: A man named Barry Swegle became upset about a fence his neighbor had installed.
The appropriate response: Talking it out with the neighbor, if that doesn't work, maybe contacting a local council or something. If that doesn't work, smashing down the fence when your neighbor isn't home then denying all knowledge.
The actual response: Barry got into a bulldozer and partially leveled his neighborhood.
Apparently the fence, which was installed by Barry's neighbor several months ago, was blocking Barry from being able to move his logging equipment in and out of his driveway in the small town of Port Angeles, Washington.
This caused some kind of dispute between the neighbors, which, according to Barry's brother, turned Barry into "a ticking time bomb."
On Monday, Time Bomb Barry exploded. He got into his bulldozer and smashed down the fence. But his rampage didn't end there, he carried on rampaging and destroyed four houses, a boat, a truck, and knocked down a telephone pole.
Once he was all rampaged out, Barry was arrested and charged with two counts of first-degree assault and six counts of first-degree malicious mischief.
Cry-Baby #2: Monroe County, Pennsylvania
The incident: 18-year-old high school senior Larry Liero mooned a couple of kids.
The appropriate response: Nothing. Mooning is funny. I guess if it was really bothering the kids, they could have yelled at Larry or something.
The actual response: Larry was suspended from school and arrested.
According to police, Larry mooned two 13-year-old girls who were being taken on a tour of his school, Pleasant Valley High School in Monroe County, Pennsylvania.
The mooning victims told their teacher, who told school officials, who told the school-resource police pfficer.
Larry was escorted from the school in handcuffs and taken to the local police station, where he was charged with disorderly conduct and open lewdness. He was also barred from taking part in his school's graduation ceremony and suspended. His charges could lead to a year in prison.
In a statement, Doug Arnold, the school district's superintendent said, "It's a violation of law not to keep your clothes on. It's unacceptable in school." He added, "I don't know that anybody would condone mooning someone"—suggesting that Doug knows some really, really fucking boring people.
Who is the bigger cry-baby up in here? Let us know in this poll:
Winner: The school!!!