Cry-Baby of the Week
Aug 30 2013
It's time, once again, to name and shame the week's biggest pussies.
Cry-Baby #1: Houston Police Department
The incident: While playing doctor with a group of kids, a nine-year-old girl touched the genitals of a four-year-old boy.
The appropriate response: Telling her that's an inappropriate thing to do.
The actual response: She was arrested and charged with aggravated sexual assault.
According to Houston's Fox 26 News, the young girl, who they're calling "Ashley" (not her real name), was among a group of kids playing doctor in the courtyard of the apartment she lives in with her mother.
At some point, a neighbor claims she saw Ashley touch a four-year-old boy in his "private area" and called the boy's mother to let her know.
A few weeks later, Ashley was out playing with some friends when she got a call from her mom telling her she needed to head home.
When she got there, she was arrested by officers from the Houston Police Department for aggravated sexual assault.
"I was crying and they took me to the car and I didn't want to get in and I was crying and I was moving and trying not to get in the police car and my mom told me to calm down," said Ashley, in an interview with Fox 26.
Weediquette: The Cannabis Republic of Uruguay - Part 1
London Is Turning into a Depressing and Dumb Stock Image City
Here Be Dragons: Sorry, Everyone, Making Fuel Out of Seawater Isn't Gonna Save Humanity
Seven Important Truths About How the World Takes Drugs in 2014
Our E-Cigarettes Are Going to Melt Our Faces and Burn Our Houses Down
Owning Porno Used to Mean Something, Damnit
Photos of the Bathrooms and Kitchens of America's Bachelors
Stop Panicking About Getting Older, You Pricks
How Airbnb Makes Tax Day So Much Worse
Advice for the Twitter Professional at US Airways Who Tweeted Hardcore Porn