Grudge Match

Conor: “This is by our dear friend, Nicholas Bannerman. He has, without a doubt, the most sordid, urine-soaked childhood stories you’ve ever heard and this picture is, I assume, his attempt to package that up for the world.”

Leeds, for me, is a horrible place. Cold, grey and grim. Both my parents worked all day every day during the week so when I was a kid I got carted off to my auntie Jane’s place near Chapeltown in Leeds for large chunks of the summer holidays every year. To this day, the drive up the M1 fills me with dread. It came as little surprise to me when I discovered that the MP3s circulating on punk forums by a band called Mob Rules were the product of the city of Leeds. Powerviolence might have originated bathed in West Coast sunshine but its unrelenting, uncompromising brutality and anger perfectly reflects just how grim and fucking depressing the north of England can be. It has helped make Mob Rules the best punk band in the UK, though, so maybe it’s not all bad. Are you sure you aren’t the German band Mob Rules hiding out in Leeds after singing one too many songs about barbarians and witches? Conor Rickford (drums): No. (Thomas) Campbell (vocals) came up with the name. He assured us it was Greg Ginn’s seventh-favourite Black Sabbath record. I can’t really make out the lyrics very well because Campbell’s voice sounds a bit like a Morris Minor stalling. What are you guys singing about? Paul Steere (bass): The frustrations that arise from having to write lyrics. Conor: We practice on a Saturday night in a lock-up in the middle of Leeds. Can you imagine the refreshing impetus provided as we fight our way through the fleshy gauntlet of hen nights resplendent in their blotchy, fake-tanned arms, Persil-white thighs and lobotomised, glazed eyes staring out from their booze-soaked faces? The fuel for our motor is topped up every weekend, right on our doorstep. Grudge is the most abundant natural resource we have. Paul: I spend a lot of time being pissed off with everyone. If I could kill people by rolling my eyes, all these guys would be dead by now. But so far I’ve never been seriously tempted to go for a major artery. Why can no one find you online? Paul: Well, we don’t have a MySpace or a Facebook. We don’t need them. Conor: Metering our popularity online is not something I’m that keen on doing. Probably because I’m afraid of what it might do to my confidence.  Paul: I’m not big into hanging out anyway. Good fucking luck to the lot of them. This is our drawings issue. Are any of you artistically inclined? Paul: Conor writes extensive lists of the money we all owe him for various things, then illustrates them with a range of different stickmen, each one signalling a different level of dissatisfaction. I’ve come to notice that his dissatisfaction fluctuates wildly. This betrays a fundamental weakness of character. I wouldn’t vote for him. MARIA CANGELLI
Mob Rules’ seven-inch, “The Donor”, is out in December on SuperFi Records.