Do We Really Believe That a Man Demanded a McDonald's Job Application with a Gun?

Mugshot Courtesy of Norfolk PD, via

There's a hilarious story spreading across the internet right now about an idiot who asked for a McDonald's application at gunpoint. Either that or he took a gun to a job interview, or something. Either way, what makes it funny is that only a brain-dead thug would do it. After all, if you're going to risk arrest, why not hold the place up? When something makes this little sense, it should be a giveaway that it didn't happen the way the internet is reporting it. But why let that stand in the way of a good story when the public is "lovin' it"? See what I did there?

This all happened last week, but it didn't show up in the press until today. Thirty-one-year-old Tevin Kievelle Monroe walked into a McDonald's to try and apply for a job. He asked the manager for a paper application, and she turned him down, saying he'd have to apply online. When he asked a second time and still got turned down, he apparently lifted his shirt to flash a handgun. The manager, described as "quick-thinking" by theVirginian-Pilot, went into a back room and retrieved a paper application, but in the process, she called the cops. Next, "Monroe took a seat and began filling it out," according to the New York Daily News, and that was when the cops showed up. He's being charged with gun possession, brandishing a firearm, and disorderly conduct.

The McDonalds where it happened via Google Street View

As you do with an offbeat article, the writers filing stories on this are tossing in all the shitty jokes they can think of, and to some extent, I can't blame them; I shit on other people to pay the bills too. Inside Tidewater's story quips, "He'll have a Big Mac with a side of five to ten," although that sentence seems a bit harsh considering he was arrested on misdemeanor charges.

The trouble with all of these versions is that theVirginian-Pilot's original story comes straight from the cops. I do not trust said cops. Therefore, I will now attempt to spoil everyone's good time:

Cops: Man Demands McDonalds Job Application at Gunpoint: VIRGINIA - Police say they have charged 31-year-old T… http://t.co/FWNgPImeLG

— The Conversation (@BreitbartsConvo) December 18, 2013

First of all, as I said above, he didn't do anything "at gunpoint," which is how the story is getting spread. Cops said he flashed the gun, which they didn't see happen. It seems possible that the gun became visible for some other reason, and the manager saw it. The alternative is that Monroe threatened violence in response to a minor inconvenience, which sounds like a serious mental disorder. Some surveillance footage would clear this up, but in the meantime, why are we accepting the cops' version of events? Oh, right. Because it's funnier. Look how serious he looks in the mug shot! What a dumbass!

More importantly though, why wouldn't the lady give the guy a paper application when he asked? The stories all say he asked twice, and then flashed the gun, at which point she finally capitulated. What was stopping her before that? People applying at McDonald's are poor—41 percent of them don't own computers. Requiring absolutely every job seeker to apply online is becoming popular because it's a good way to prevent racial descrimination, but it does give a leg up to people with computers at home. Even still, if this is aimed at preventing racial descrimination, why exactly is the staff lying to people about not having paper applications in the store? Are they lying to everyone equally?

The McDonald's where this took place is less than a block from Tidewater Gardens Housing Project (pictured below), and while being in the ghetto doesn't excuse the crime of toting a concealed firearm around when you're job hunting, it certainly helps me understand the impulse. It also paints a more complete picture of the neighborhood this McDonald's manager was dealing with, and her possible reasons for being a little extra vigilant, and maybe having an itchy 9-1-1 trigger.

via Google Street View

While the version of events that's currently for sale––in which a deranged thug went all Walter Sobchak at a McDonald's when the lady behind the counter made it hard to apply for a job––sounds humorous at face value, I don't see why we're all so eager to laugh. A 31-year-old taking a job that pays $7.50 per hour is seen by experts as a shrewd, "better than nothing" career move, even while people who already have that job are striking for better wages.

So even if you choose to believe what everyone is telling you about this story, I'm sure you'll agree that it's an example of a really sad kind of desperation. If, on the other hand, the cops embellished even the slightest of details, then the real story is seriously fucked up.

@MikeLeePearl