Love Tips with Donny Benét: Getting Serious

Funk master and world class lover Donny Benét continues his step-by-step guide to everlasting love this week by walking you through the tricky follow up to the perfect first date.

If you’ve followed my advice so far, I’m pretty certain you’ve had some success in the game of love. All the boxes have been ticked: respect for the family, romance, fine dining, disco dancing and the hopefully the tender touch. But you’re asking, where to go now? Do you see this as a thing or was it just a part-time touch? I hope you’re a man of class and you’re going to stick around, after all, you still haven’t gotten the secret to nonna’s gnocchi!

I always think that the beginning of a relationship is the most emotionally turbulent part of its lifespan. It’s a time where both skins are paper-thin and the slightest slip can send you packing in no time. Today we’re loaded with newfound stressors like technology and social media, simply forgetting to “like” a photo or missing a text message due to a dead phone could spell disaster. It’s especially tricky to keep a balance between being yourself and the person you think they want. That’s where having the guidance of a sophisticated lover can help you out.

So I’m guessing the date went really well. Hopefully after the tiramisu and dancing you shared a romantic stroll and some tender moments in the car outside her parents house. In fact it probably went so well you’re taking her out again this Saturday night. But there’s a catch: Papa is so excited at the prospect of his daughter seeing an Italo-Australian boy he’s invited all the family over for lunch this Saturday. Once again it’s vital to keep your eyes and ears open and be able to think on your feet in order to keep seeing questa bella ragazza.

As mentioned it’s very important to turn up to any Italian household with some type of gift. My nonna usually takes a carton of eggs when visiting, but for this occasion I would strongly recommend a carton of Chinotto or a cask of Lambrusco. Flowers or a Panettone are a must for nonna, mum and bella. If you’re serious about sealing the deal, be sure to stop off at a high-end delicatessen and pick up some Calabrian salami. Don’t hesitate to contact me for some hot tips on the best Italian cold meats.

Meeting all of the uncles is going to be a bit of a tough one. They’ll eyeball you and ask all kinds of questions: What do you do for a living? How much do you make? Who was your favourite Italian player in the 1982 world cup team? Ferrari or Lamborghini? Al Pacino or Robert De Niro? Which is the best Bud Spencer and Terence Hill movie?

As for Papa, how to impress him this time? Besides money and physical strength, nothing impresses a Mediterranean man more than being able to construct a good strong fire with enough long lasting heat to cook several small animals. Again it’s a test of your masculinity, and lucky for you, I’ve been taught the art of BenétBQ by a Cypriot fire master. It’s simple, approach your fire making like you would when making love; start small and slow, look, listen, be attentive, and in no time there will be an overwhelming heat in front of you. Do this and Papa will know his daughter is in safe, sensual and decisive hands.

After a few hours of lasagna, barbequed meats, red wine and arguing over a few games of bocce you’ll have passed the family test with flying colours and again find yourself ready for a night of romance.

Because it’s the second date you can mix things up and perhaps be a bit more casual about your intentions. She’ll be glowing with pride in how well you handed the prospective future family interview, as far as she’s concerned, you could take her out for a hamburger and she’d view it as fine dining. For tonight’s cuisine I would recommend going to a Japanese restaurant. Nothing says sophistication more than a selection of delicious sashimi and piping hot sake. Top the night off a beachside gelato and hopefully you’ll soon be making out on the beach with the sound of crashing waves in your ears and the feeling of sand between your toes.

Don

xx

Follow Donny on Twitter: @donnybenet

Previously:

On The Date

The First Date