What's the Longest You've Been Without Sleep?
Welcome to Question of the Day. It gives interns something to do!
You sleep more than four hours a day? You fucking pussy! Sleeping's, like, totally a waste of time that could be put to better use staying up taking industrial amounts of stimulants, perpetuating exhaustion, triggering unpredictable mood swings, and crying into a mirror.
If you stay awake long enough, I've heard your body starts auto-producing caffeine. Your primal urges surface and you develop split personalities. Eventually, it'll burn a hole in your frontal lobe and your gums will peel off around your teeth. Fun. What is the longest you have gone without hitting the sack and why?
Ben, 19: Five days.
How was it?
Fucking horrible. Five days later when I finally came down I had to stumble home while falling asleep.
Did anybody try to take advantage of you in your vulnerable state?
I took so many drugs I was seeing loads of shit for like two months. So if they did, it was a hallucination.
Was it worth it?
It was an experience. I wouldn’t say it was worth it.
Steven, 25: Probably about two days. It’s not that much, is it?
What was the situation?
I was at Glastonbury, there was so much going on.
Were there mind-altering substances keeping you from sleep?
No, I think it was just the fact that I was at Glastonbury, which felt kind of glamorous.
Katie, 17: A day and a half.
It was New Year's.
Was there a point when you realized, shit, I need some sleep?
When I conked out.
What effects did the lack of sleep have?
Were there any slurring of words, or short, brief replies to questions?
I need what you were on.
Will, 31: Two days. I was on holiday,. I had an epic last night of partying, flew back on the plane wide awake and arrived back at midday. And then slept for a long time.
Could people tell that you hadn’t slept in ages?
Yeah, I looked like shit and I was hysterical.
How did you feel?
I was floating on a cloud and sweating a lot.
Dave, 21: Two days, one night.
Why do that to yourself?
I was at a club till really late and I had work at 8 AM. I thought there was no point in going to bed, so I just stayed up.
Did the lack of sleep effect your efficiency?
Totally, it was a write-off. I hardly got anything done.
Was it worth it?
I didn’t enjoy my job at all. So yeah.
Jemima, 26: Two days, I was monged out and shit.
Karen, 35: Probably about two days.
Everyone says two days. Why?
At university working to a deadline and I had to get four essays done. Loads of coffee.
Alice, 24: More than 48 hours I would say, something like 55 hours.
I used to work as a waitress with 16-hour shifts and it wasn’t really worth going home. So we went out, I went home in the morning for breakfast and a shower, then went back to work.
Did you spill coffee over customers' laps?
No, working was fine, because the adrenaline gets you high. But after doing that for five days, you start looking like a zombie. The bags under my eyes reached all the way to my knees.
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