What Animal Are You Most Like?
Welcome to Question of the Day. It gives interns something to do!
It’d be amazing to be an animal. You wouldn’t have to deal with half the shit humans have to put up with. Assuming you weren’t a slug, or one of those proboscis monkeys with the noses that look like dicks. That would suck. We headed out onto the streets to see what strangers think their animal equivalents are.
Daryl, 25, fashion reporter: A cat. People have misconceptions about cats, they think they’re quite cold. I think cats are very independent, and they come to you when they need something and leave you alone when they don’t. I think I’m quite like that.
You sound like quite a socially manipulative person.
I just like to think that I'm a pretty independent person.
Jamie, 25, student: A sloth. Because I’m a lazy shit.
Ross, 20, student: It’s a hard question. What animal would you say is quite energetic?
But they haven’t got much stamina, apparently. They can only run for a few seconds. I have good stamina.
Oh yeah? Then what about a dog?
OK. I’d be a border collie, then. They’re pretty lively.
Caitlyn, 19, bartender: A Cheshire cat.
VICE: Like the character from Alice In Wonderland?
Yeah. It’s my smile.
A white rabbit because I have blonde hair.
Are you obsessed with Alice In Wonderland?
Sam, 21, shop assistant: A cat.
VICE: What kind of cat?
A Persian cat. They are the coolest cats.
What makes you so cool?
Because you took my photo.
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