
Not all cults are about rousing demonic spirits and sacrificing your kids in the woods in front of bonfires. Some offer perfectly reasonable and alternative lifestyle choices that are 100 percent worth exploring. As long as you don't mind that most of those choices ultimately lead to Satan and infanticide.
So let's see if we can make a change. What would your cult be all about?

VICE: What would your cult be about?
Felix, 25, designer: World peace!
How would you get that to happen?
Legalize drugs.
Every drug?
Erm, just weed.
Would you prescribe it to everyone, so everyone has to smoke it?
No, only if you want to.
Maybe we could have a stoned parliament?
[With the face of someone who just had their mind blown] Wow, yeah definitely.

Jamie, 31, painter: [bursts into hysterical laughter and then repeats question to himself]
So?
Erm, alright. God man, I don’t know.
Come on.
I would paint everything black!
Well I guess you have the paint.

Julia, 29, manager: A leader of...?
Like if loads of people listened to everything you said and would do anything you tell them.
Oh, let me think. OK, I would cancel all borders, so everyone could travel where they wanted, no different nationalities.
Cool, so you would make a global community?
Yes, we're all citizens of the world!
Very original.

Cat, 32, sales assistant: I know! Less tax!

Katlynn, 22, designer: Be kinder to other people, and to be happy.
Would you make that a requirement to be in the cult?
Yes!
Would you imprison depressed people?
[laughs] Yes!
That should cheer them up, good job.

Richard, 51, urban hygienist: Too many people smoke.
Previously - Whose Phone Would You Hack?

The Mare
A New Story by Mary Gaitskill
Toppling a Delicate World
Being Gay and South Asian In America
There's No Sex in Prison Showers
We Usually Wore Our Underwear
Try Not to Destroy Your Life
The First Time I Took Molly
A Teacher and Her Student
Marilynne Robinson on Staying Out of Trouble
"Whitey" Isn't Very Popular in Boston
Interviews with Some of His Old Friends
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