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Slimming Down

Anorexia Ain't No Thang

By Casey Kitchens


Karen Carpenter, role model. Courtesy of Photofest



Anorexia’s not as hard as you think, you just have to get on the train. I know because I didn’t eat for ten days and I feel great. Not only that, but I lost the weight.

DAY ONE: By 1 PM I feel like I am walking on undulating ground. I am ALREADY starving, so there is no way I’ll make it. There is a handful of rice in the sink from yesterday and it has a delectable aroma.

DAY TWO: I dream Cambodians are slicing gore off a floating corpse. I almost faint when I get out of bed. My breath tastes like old guy and my tongue is white. When I leave a party in a neighborhood I know well, I get literally lost in literal fog for half an hour.

DAY THREE: I spend the entire day watching movies and grooming myself. I also clean my apartment. I am not a messy person, so this amounts to organizing my herbal teas. People call to invite me out but I don’t answer the phone because I am afraid I will have another episode. Oh, I didn’t tell you. Last night when a bouncer yelled at me, I cried.

DAY FOUR: I get four more movies. I’m not hungry anymore. Tingles of pleasure move in clouds up and down my body, through my chest and up into my head. I am soooooooo blissed out.

DAYS FIVE TO SEVEN: I am unflappable. People can say or do whatever they want and it’s like: [Here I am making a face like I am a mannequin and you can’t faze me]. I am really fucking thin too, and rosy like a newborn babe.

I switch into a pair of wool pants I had tailored when I was 18. I notice all the flaws in the bodies of the girls I work with. Even the skinny ones have thick rib cages or boxy asses. Ew. Why would they eat?

DAY EIGHT: OK, fuck this. I am going to die. I look like shit. My boss wrote “for God’s sake” in an email and I screamed, at the top of my lungs, “You asshole!”

I am falling apart. Please, I so hungwee. Pleese… I need some-theen to ate. Aything would hep.

DAY NINE: I stay home from work because I am not cool for work right now. I walk three miles. I try on some clothes. I’m less fat than I was, but I need to lose 20 pounds, at least. I buy a scale. I have lost 14 pounds. Shit. I’m gonna stay anorexic.

DAY TEN: When midnight strikes I ream six oranges and drink the juice while standing. I suck the pulp off the reamer. Before going to bed, I’ve had 20 oranges. My ass is spreading. Anorexia is cool and everything, but I got to eat, y’all. I be hongry!

CASEY KITCHENS

By Casey Kitchens 5 years ago

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