THE ALMIGHTY DEFENDERS GIVE LINDSAY LOHAN A FACELOAD

We came across some fancy French blog with photos of our buddies the Almighty Defenders partying at the Cannes Festival with Lindsay Lohan. We're still pretty far from being 100 percent on exactly what's going on here, but we threw the photo captions into Google Translate and they were funny in a we-don't-give-a-crap-because-it's-Friday-afternoon kind of way so we left them as is.

Lindsay Lohan poses next to the Baron of King Khan at Cannes. Long live the mix of genres!

King Khan was removing Josephine de la Baume at Jimmy's in Cannes.

King Khan has managed to blush Lindsay Lohan. Anyway. GB King Khan!

The Almighty Defenders in the garb of gospel singers to Baron in Cannes…this time without interruption. With Jen's guest-star. (No idea what the "interruption" was.)

This one even made TMZ. Apparently Khan was still stuffing his ass in Lindsay's face at the after party.

We're just as confused as you are, but we also wish we were there.