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The VICE Guide to Living in Los Angeles for Cheap or Free

Los Angeles is super expensive. Here's how you can survive in Tinseltown when your money is funny.
​ Keep an eye out on the street for free furniture. All photos by Jamie Lee Curtis Taete unless otherwise specified

Los Angeles is a city that's full of broke adults who refuse to admit they're broke. Perhaps it's because this city was built on theatrics. The city thrives on performance, and it's hard not to pretend when everyone around you is doing just that.

So, instead of meeting up with a friend to complain how you can't afford coffee, the two of you meet at a coffee shop to rattle off a list of all the projects you're working on while sipping on $8 cups of hot milk.

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Chances are you came here to pursue some kind of dream. And if you clicked on this link, that dream probably isn't going so well. Back in Iowa, or Arizona, or wherever it is you came from, brunch never cost $30. But you have to go through with it. It is another networking opportunity, after all.

Look, I'm not judging you. I'm one of you. I too, have a wild fantasy that I might one day "make it" and I'm still too stubborn to give up already. But, unlike you perhaps, I have quit deluding myself. I am broke. And it sucks.

Once I quit the act and faced these facts myself, I found that living here really isn't so bad. It took a lot of time, but I finally figured out how to manage my life in Los Angeles, even though I'm still not totally sure I'll be making rent next month. Here's how.

Before I continue, this is not a guide for those who are seriously destitute. If you are in a bad place and desperately need shelter and other services, consider going to one of the locations listed in the homeless shelter directory. On top of that, you can also look into what the Department of Public Social Services can do for you.

ASK FOR HELP

The number one thing you must do in order to survive in this city as a broke person is relinquish any and all thoughts in your mind that you have dignity. When it's the third day of a new month, and you're still $200 short to make the previous month's rent, no task or small job is beneath you (as long as it's safe and legal).

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You must be OK with admitting that you're desperate. In times like these, I have taken to social media. But, don't just post on Facebook that you need money and expect people to just give it to you. Offer work in return. I've cleaned many an acquaintance's apartment, run errands for them, babysat their children and their pets, tutored their other children, and done some last-minute catering for their parties (that I wasn't invited to).

One time I got paid $100 just to hang out with some guy who lived in Covina. I didn't know him at all, but he had seen me perform comedy once and friended me on Facebook. After I confirmed he was not using the term "hang out" as some sort of euphemism for sex, we met up at a public space and had a few drinks. This is a freak occurrence, sure, but it goes to show that the internet makes anything possible. For better or worse.

Like that other time I sent a guy pictures of my feet for a $50 Amazon gift card. Give it a try for yourself and see what happens.

SHOPPING

Why more people don't embrace the splendor of the 99 Cents Only store, I will never understand. Almost every single thing you need is contained within those four walls, and will only cost you 99 cents (plus tax). This is where I buy most of my must-haves such as toilet paper, toothpaste, batteries, cleaning products, even food.

Sure, these items will belong to brands you've never heard of but brand loyalty is a privilege, not a right. If you're still not a fan, try visiting alternative dollar stores such as Dollar Tree or, my personal favorite, Daiso. Daiso is a Japanese discount store, whose products all cost $1.50. However, that extra dough is worth it due to how much cuter everything is. Go ahead, spend that extra fifty cents on an oven mitt shaped like an alligator. I'll allow it.

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LIVING

If your parents live in LA, you are truly blessed. Never leave their house.

For everyone else, roommates are the way to go if you want cheaper rent. Get creative with your living space and see just how many people can actually fit in there. You might want to look into setting up shop in a living room. I did this for a while and my rent was only $350. Sure, I had curtains for walls, and found it incredibly difficult to bring guys back to my place, but I'll repeat: my rent was $350.

You probably want to avoid any neighborhood that has more than one store-front with the word "artisan" on it, unless you can get grandfathered into somewhere rent controlled.

Also, living in your vehicle has, for whatever reason, become a cool thing to do recently. This isn't something that would work for someone with as much crap from Daiso as I have cluttering up my apartment, but if you can make it work for you, you could save yourself a shitload of money.

CLOTHING

Photo by Ben Karris

Give up on buying anything new. You're buying your clothes at thrift stores, unless there happens to be a store-wide sale at already discounted retail spots like the Urban Outfitters Surplus Store or that big outlet mall that looks like an Assyrian castle.

It doesn't hurt that in more recent years, thrifting has been deemed hip and, shockingly, has managed to stay hip during even the roughest and most trying of times. You need to be at a place mentally where spending $20 on a shirt is outrageous. That means staying away from anything that calls itself "vintage." Vintage is what well-off people buy when they want to feel quirky. You're too broke to be quirky.

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A great way to get clothes for free is to organize a clothing swap. Get people you know together in one place and make everyone (including yourself) bring a trash bag or two full of items they don't wear anymore. Sift through each other's things and grab what you can. Anything left over can be donated.

TRANSPORT

When it comes to transportation, know that you don't always have to drive or Uber. Sometimes, you can do the unthinkable and walk where you need to go (also a good way to get some free exercise). Buses are fine, and our subway system isn't all that bad, either. They're continuing to add new lines, and it's also a great way to avoid being stuck in traffic.

FOOD

Of course fast food is cheap, but you can still eat healthy when you're broke. It's just going to take more time and effort. Instead of buying $8 smoothies, you're going to have to make it yourself. Those smoothie places even have the audacity to list their ingredients, most of which are standard fruits and vegetables you already have at home. You're really paying for someone else to press a button on a blender and clean the mess up afterwards. You can't afford for things to be made easier for you. Just wash your goddamn blender.

It's super important to be familiar with all of the grocery stores in your area. Again, being on a strict budget means you don't have the luxury of getting everything you need in one place, no matter how conveniently located it is. You have to know which grocery store has the best value for individual items. For instance, meat and bread tends to be cheaper at Von's than at Trader Joe's, but Trader Joe's has cheaper cheeses and eggs.

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When it comes to produce, stay away from chain grocery stores entirely. Take advantage of the 99 Cents Only store (I have purchased chia seeds there, you guys) or the many bodegas this city has. Corner markets, like Produce for Less on Melrose Ave sell a wide variety of fruits and vegetables at highly reduced prices. The catch is, they're not always in the freshest condition, so you need to make sure you're eating your 50 cent cabbage that day. There's also this website called Fallen Fruit, that has maps showing you all the places where fruit is growing on public property in various neighborhoods around the city. And, of course, dumpster diving.

In case you didn't know, food is refundable at most grocery stores so save your receipt and get your money back if you accidentally bought something you don't want or need.

ALCOHOL

Drinking with friends is one of the quickest ways to suck money straight out of your wallet. Because we have agreed as a society that alcohol generally makes being around people more tolerable, it has become acceptable for bars to charge you $7 or more for a single beverage.

The only ways to save money and go to bars are: don't drink, or drink before going to the bar.

The first is obviously going to save you the most, but the latter will still ensure you spend less. In college, we called option number two pregaming, but nobody is allowed to call it this since being handed their diploma (read the fine print). Or, alternatively, sneak in a bottle of liquor and just buy mixers (unless that's illegal, in which case I definitely didn't tell you to do that).

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Another thing to take advantage of is happy hour. Most bars in Los Angeles have great happy hour specials, many of which can be found via quick Google or Yelp searches. Convince your friends to start partying earlier. Not only will you save money but you'll be in bed by 10 PM, like a proper adult. My personal favorite happy hour spot is the the Silverlake Lounge. From 5-8 PM, this cash only bar serves $3 domestic beers and $4 imported beers and wells. On Sundays, PBR pitchers are $7. That brings me to another point, stick to dive bars. How do you know if you're at a dive versus an overpriced bar made to look like a dive? Count how many patrons inside are wearing wide-brimmed hats. If it's more than zero, get out of there.

Aside from dives, embrace the glory of our city's most sacred and hidden of gems: chain restaurants. Specifically, Acapulco's Margarita Monday. All day Monday they serve $2 margaritas.

If you're lucky enough to be a glamorous media-industry freelancer like me, you might occasionally be invited to product launches or other promotional events that have free alcohol. You'll probably have to talk to a PR person about whatever product is being promoted while you're drinking that alcohol, but you can handle that. It's like a YouTube preroll ad, but for booze.

Alternatively, some brands will attempt to schmooze you with freebies in exchange for coverage, so make sure you're nice to that PR person. (Fuck. I guess I really should've thought about that before I wrote about Acapulco's Margarita Monday for free up there. DM me on Twitter if this post set off your Google Alert and you wanna send me some free shit, Acapulco PR person.)

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ENTERTAINMENT

I'm not going to throw any of that movie theater shtick at you. We are all aware of how expensive it is to go to the movies without me cracking some joke about having to sell a kidney to see Zootopia. If you have a hankering for the movie theater experience, consider going to places like the Valley 6 Plaza in North Hollywood. On Sunday and Tuesday, general admission is only $1.50. On other days, it's still pretty affordable at $3.

This is mostly older movies, so if you're too impatient to wait a few months to watch Zootopia, check out Highland Theaters in Highland Park. They have $5 tickets on Tuesdays and Wednesdays for newly released films. Also, I've never EVER done this, obviously, but I heard there was this thing called "torrenting" that lets you watch films for free. But IDK anything about that at all, so I guess you'll have to google it.

As for live entertainment, I urge you to embrace the Los Angeles alternative comedy scene. Alternative comedy venues, unlike most comedy clubs, rarely charge admission and are desperate (I repeat, desperate) to have you in their audience. Venues that are sure to have a free or cheap comedy show of some sort happening at least once a week include: The Virgil, The Clubhouse, and the Lab at the Hollywood Improv.

Make use of the 5 Every Day app which lets you know about five things happening in Los Angeles every day of the week. Each listing provides cost information to help you better assess if it's worth going to or not.

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Oh, and you can get a free boat to Catalina Island on your birthday, which is a lovely place to spend your birthday (alone because none of your friends can afford to join you).

FITNESS

The scenic beauty of Griffith Park

Exercise is important, but gyms are the biggest scam on the entire planet. There is pretty much nothing you can do in a gym that can't be replicated for free outside of one.

You can swim in the ocean for free. You can hike in Griffith park for free (which looks a lot nicer than the inside of any gym). You can run anywhere for free. You can find fitness classes and workout videos on YouTube. You can lift pretty much any object that weighs whatever amount you're looking for for free.

Alternatively, there's enough gyms in LA that you could probably go the rest of your life working out daily on nothing but free trial sessions.

SAVINGS

The hardest thing to do when you're living month to month is save, and yet, saving is what we must try and do in order to maybe one day dig ourselves out of the cute little hellhole we have made for ourselves. I've begun tricking myself into building up savings by using the Acorns app. Acorns rounds up your spending to the nearest dollar, then both saves and invests this spare change for you. While the investments aren't major, this is still the closest I have ever come to feeling like the Monopoly man.

Another thing you can do is sign up for focus groups. There are a lot of focus groups happening all over the city on a weekly basis needing your valuable insight on laundry detergent and beer commercials. If you qualify, you can get up to $300 for participating (though it's usually more in the $75-$125 range). Sign up to get email notifications at places like Adler Weiner Research and Q Insights. They'll email you surveys to take and based on your answers (as well as how many participants they need), will invite you to join. You won't be getting into every focus group you sign up for, but when it does happen, it'll be a great way to make some money you weren't planning on getting (a.k.a. money you can save).

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I've been in focus groups that had me smoke cloves, taste-test candy, play smartphone games, and visit Kosher grocery stores. Most of these were actually kind of fun (except for the cloves one).

CREATIVE WAYS TO CHEAT

Photo by the Ben Karris

Remember how you're too broke for self-respect? Well, you're also too broke for morals.

Sometimes, you're going to have to lie and cheat to get things. I'm talking about baby lies and little cheats. Nothing that can land you in jail (which can totally happen if you do that thing at a restaurant where you ask for a water cup and fill it with Sprite, btw).

Skip buying coffee, and grab some for free at Trader Joe's. Most banks also have free coffee in their waiting areas. If you must have Starbucks, just buy one shot of espresso over ice and then have at it with their free milk. This is exactly an iced latte, but around $2 cheaper. Create a new email account every time you order from food delivery apps like Grubhub, and take advantage of that first-timer discount.

You can also return things in your home you've never used at major stores like Target, CVS, and Wal-Mart who will give you store credit if you don't have a receipt (CVS will only let you do this twice though). Grab extra ketchup, mustard, and hot sauce packets if you find yourself at a fast food place. This goes for napkins and straws too. If you haven't already, ask a kind friend or relative to give you their Netflix and Hulu passwords. HBOGo as well, if you're lucky (then give it to me).

Speaking of major stores. If a service isn't up to standard: complain. You'll usually get free vouchers from the company, regardless of how stupid your complaint is.

Any time you can get your hands on something of value for free that you don't need, take it and sell it. For instance, I was given an Android tablet by my mom who didn't want it and ended up selling it on Craigslist for $100. Friends have given me designer clothes and shoes they were planning on getting rid of, which I've sold to Crossroads and Buffalo Exchange. One time, I won a cock ring in a raffle, and ended up getting $80 for it on eBay. As long as it's in new or like-new condition, chances are someone will buy it for close to its original price. Even cock rings.

In fact, if you wanna fuck the system entirely, you should aim to develop a barter system among your social circles similar to the clothing swap suggested earlier. Find friends who can provide a service for you (like haircuts) and offer them something in return that isn't money. Cook a meal for them, fix an appliance of theirs, clean their yard. Anything you're willing to do.

Follow Alison Stevenson on Twitter.