This Week In Florida - Prescription Drugs, Stolen Paintings, and Great White Sharks

On October 29, 1964, infamous surfing champion, cat burglar, and murderer Jack Murphy (aka Murph the Surf) boosted the golf ball-sized ‘Star of India’ sapphire from the American Museum of Natural History in New York (along with other valuable gems). At 563.35 carats, it was one of the largest of its kind, and worth $400,000. Within days, Murph and his accomplices were arrested in Miami Beach, where they were well-known thieves.

In January 1965, investigators from New York traveled to Miami to try and locate the still-missing gems. Sometime after midnight on January 8, detectives received a call in their room at the University Inn motel, near the University of Miami campus: “The Star of India is in a bus station locker,” the anonymous caller said. They followed the tipster’s precise instructions and recovered the gem.

Flash Forward:
In January 2003, curators at the Sofia Imber Contemporary Art Museum in Caracas, Venezuela discovered that a 1925 Henri Matisse painting, worth $3 million, called Odalisque in Red Pants had been stolen and swapped with a forgery—at least three years earlier.

On Tuesday, Pedro Antonio Marcuello of Miami and María Martha Ornelas, recently arrived from Mexico City, met with buyers at the Loews Miami Beach Hotel who’d agreed to purchase the long-missing painting for $740,000. Ornelas revealed the Matisse rolled in a tube she’d traveled with and the buyers revealed themselves to be undercover FBI agents.

Art Basel put Miami on the art world map. The problem with being on the map, however, is that, well, you’re on the map. Before Basel Miami began ten years ago, this might have been an unlikely location to fence fine art. In Florida, if you bring us the industry, we’ll bring you the associated scam.

This is why we can’t have nice things.

Welcome to This Week in Florida.

- Prior to last year’s crackdown, Broward was the “pill mill” capital of the world. The county had more pill mills than McDonald’s (seriously). Last weekend, the Broward Sheriff’s Office unveiled a program for residents to trade in their prescription meds for gift cards. In promoting the event, their website revealed that between June 2010 and May 2011, 79 percent of overdose deaths in the county were from prescription drugs. Eighty-five percent of those were accidental.

- The Clearwater City Council is considering a proposal to outlaw public sitting. The idea is to pressure the homeless, but some residents feel the measure is too extreme—violators could face up to a $500 fine, 60 days in jail, or both.

- Jose Rodriguez, the suspended mayor of Boynton who is already facing corruption charges, was booked again this week on three new felony charges.

- A group of divers had a rare great white shark sighting off the coast of Fort Pierce and caught it on video. The scary thing, however, is that a shark can turn up anywhere in Florida, even on public transportation.

- Two armed robbers stormed an internet café in Ocala and a 71-year-old customer leapt from his terminal and opened fire on the would-be thieves. He hit them both while they fell all over each other to get the hell out of there. Their injuries were not life-threatening but, more importantly, the action was caught on not one, not two, but three different security cameras.

- I know this often seems like a “cops behaving badly” column, but, hey, cut me some slack—it’s Florida! This week, the Officer Tony Montana Award goes to former City of Miami Sergeant Raul Iglesias, indicted on nine federal charges including conspiracy to commit a violation of civil rights, civil rights violations, conspiracy to possess and possession with the intent to distribute cocaine and crack cocaine, obstruction of justice, and making false official statements. He faces 20 years in prison.

- A South Florida man who allegedly murdered his ex-wife’s new husband by shooting him six times in the chest is claiming self-defense under our “Stand Your Ground” law. Plan B: Claim it was a suicide.

- The Florida Department of Law Enforcement was preparing a 52-count indictment against US Representative David Rivera (R-FL) on charges of theft, money laundering, and racketeering after an extensive investigation of his campaign finances. Instead, Miami-Dade County State Attorney Katherine Fernandez Rundle decided not to prosecute and send him back up to Washington, DC to keep up the good work.

- The former chief of US Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE) in Miami plead guilty to federal child pornography charges and now faces up to 50 years in prison.

- Three NFL players were arrested last weekend (and another was busted for DUI this week). Of course, if we’re talking NFL off-season shenanigans, Miami Beach has got to be a part of the conversation: Last Saturday, Denver Broncos defensive end Elvis Dumervil was arrested for aggravated assault with a firearm after a road rage incident on Collins Avenue.

- In Florida, even the hustlers get hustled: This guy posed as a famous rock drummer and scammed multiple “high-end” escorts into traveling to South Florida on their own dime, taking him to dinner and even sleeping with him.

- Floridians even try to scam judges: During a videotaped hearing, a 58-year-old defendant accused of trespassing claimed he’s disabled and will spend the rest of his life confined to a bed. Feeling sympathy for him, the judge offered him a plea deal. The man accepted, and then hopped out of his chair and walked off.The courtroom erupted in laughter and the judge quips, “He’s been cured.”

- We might be assholes in South Florida, but we’re tolerant assholes. According to Richard Florida’s “Tolerance Index,” Miami/Fort Lauderdale/Miami Beach is the 11th most tolerant metro area in the country.

- A flash mob of over 300 people rushed a Jacksonville Walmart, trashed the place, videotaped it, and posted it on YouTube.

- No story with a happy ending begins with this sentence: Two guys in Fort Walton Beach were playing dominoes and drinking beer outside a joint called the Rancho Alegre night club. They argued over a bag of pork rinds and a missing cell phone and one of the men, Will Moore Traywick (known as “Cowboy,” but also answers to “Wyatt Earp”), broke a beer bottle and stabbed the other guy in the neck three times. I don’t even know if this really counts as a Florida story, Fort Walton Beach is practically in Alabama.

- Two things the Florida State Seminoles might wanna work on at practice this summer: driving and tweeting (not at the same time). FSU cornerback Greg Reid was arrested (again) for driving with a suspended license, possession of marijuana, and a seat belt violation.

- On the other side of the field, FSU wide receiver Kenny Shaw took to Twitter to address not one, but two serious issues in less than 140 characters: “Child support is worse than aids [sic],” he wrote. So, this week, head coach Jimbo Fisher has banned players from tweeting —for the second time in nine months. Of course, it could be worse: FSU could be PSU.

- Fifteen years ago this week, on July 15, 1997, the cross-country spree of serial killer Andrew Cunanan climaxed in Miami Beach, with the murder of his second-to-last victim, fashion designer Gianni Versace outside his Ocean Drive mansion. Cunanan killed his final victim, himself, eight days later as police prepared to storm the houseboat he was hiding out in across the street from the Fontainebleau Hotel.

- We screw the shit out of each other pretty much nonstop down here in South Florida. Seriously, we’ll put it in anybody. Anytime. Anywhere. Any way we can. So says a poll conducted by Trojan Condoms of their top markets: Miamians have the most sex in America. Which reminds me—I gotta go put my penis in someone! Bye!

Billy Corben is the co-producer and director of Cocaine Cowboys, The U, and the upcoming Broke for ESPN 30 for 30 Vol. II, among other films. He also runs The Billy Pulpit.

@billyCorben