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      We Went to Chairlift's FNO Show at Prada

      September 10, 2012

      I spent Fashion's Night Out at Prada to see Chairlift perform. At fancy events such as this I always try to represent VICE with class; which is why I had my photographer take photos of me gazing into the crotch of male mannequins while I contemplated miming a BJ. After realizing that at 7PM all that was being offered beverage wise was Vitamin Water Zero, I took refuge at Crosby Street Hotel, sipping white wine and hiding from the overdressed bees swarming Broadway. What is that fabulous line Diane Kruger's character says in Inglourious Basterds?

      Don't all girls love Fashion's Night Out?

      "I don't. I like smoking, drinking and ordering in restaurants."

      Around 8PM I returned. In my absence the Soho store, whose famous wooden ramp had been converted into a stage, was bursting with bodies awaiting Chairlift's performance, and peeking at price tags on patterned purple suits. There's something about the collective consciousness of Fashion Week that brings out your inner bitch. As I sat on Prada's wooden floor crossing my leather-wrapped legs, thoughts cat-walked down my brain such as "I wish that chick in front of me would sit down, she's blocking my view. And someone tell home girl she's a size 8, not 4."

      As clocks ticked towards 9PM the pop hip-hop came to a halt ("Its not even my birthday, but he want to lick the icing off") and Chairlift appeared on stage. Caroline Polachek gracefully curtseyed and announced "Yes, we're all wearing Prada." Her arms protruded from a 70's patterned ensemble, displaying unshaven armpits which are totally hot right now. Patrick Wimberly looked quite Brooklyn in his attire, emitting a sultry, moody vibe as he focused on his guitar, unruffled by his high fashion surroundings. 

      Their best known songs, "Sidewalk Safari" and "Take it Out on Me" moved the crowd to their feet as bodies shuffled to find dancing space. Chairlift sounded lovely as always, but perhaps a bit stifled considering the unusual venue. The longer one spends in New York, or simply being alive, you learn the events with the most hype tend to be the most disappointing (Fashion's Night Out, New Years Eve, MFF threesomes). Despite my fondness for the band, by the second half of their set I found myself ready to take off my heels and return home to the land of no-pants and Breaking Bad on Amazon Instant Streaming.


      Photos by @timthegiraffe


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