brian moylan on Vice

Tubesteak

How to Hone Your Gaydar to Perfection

These days with more and more social circles becoming sexually diverse, how can you tell if the guy swinging a glow stick next to you at some Bushwick "rave" is looking to put his pole in a hole or looking for another pole to pole all over his face? Full story

Tubesteak

The Red Marriage Equality Sign on Your Facebook Profile Is Completely Useless

It's a big week in the fight for “marriage equality,” which is what most gay activists want us to call gay marriage. Right now gay activism needs all the help it can get. Know what’s not helping? Changing your Facebook profile picture to a silly red-and-pink equal sign. Full story

Tubesteak

Guys, It's Time to Stop Shaving Your Junk

There is nothing more disappointing than taking a new guy home for the first time and ripping his clothes off, only to find that he has "manscaped" himself to look like some sort of dude-shaped topiary. Full story

Tubesteak

Are You a Slut?

If you're taking this quiz, then you probably already know the answer. Still, why not give your suspicions some validity? Full story

Tubesteak

How to Suck an Uncut Cock

There comes a moment in every American cocksucker’s (and I use that term as an honorific) life when he/she pulls down a pair of trousers and is met not with a well-shorn sailor, but a hooded monk. Yes, I'm talking about the rare occasion (in America and Israel, at least) when you… Full story

Tubesteak

How to Get Laid at the Gym

Most guys approach the gym like Clint Eastwood walking into a shootout: they want to be alone, they want to be very serious, and they'll kill anyone who comes near them. That is the exact opposite of the attitude you need if you want to score some gym-toned ass. Full story

Tubesteak

Hey Straight People, You're Using Sex Drugs Wrong

The continued acceptance of homosexual men and lesbians by mainstream America means that some of the wonderful things that were kept in the darker nooks and crannies of the gay world are now seeing the light of day and, like most awesome things that gay people started, straight p… Full story

Tubesteak

What Your Underwear Says About You

Congratulations, you have convinced some poor fool to come back to your house from a bar/party/awkward OKCupid date and tricked them into thinking it's a good idea to have sex with you. While we all know dick size is really the only thing that matters, first impressions are prett… Full story

Tubesteak

How to Quit Porn and Not Entirely Ruin Your Life

There I was, lying in bed ass-naked at 1 AM on a Tuesday night with my eyes closed pulling on my limp dick like a bird trying to get a worm out of the frozen ground. This is what jerking off had become for me. I never should have given up porn. Full story

Why I Think Fashion Week Is Stupid

It's like a bunch of carnival barkers luring you into a freak show, but the Siamese twins aren't Siamese at all, it's just two bitches shoved in the same dress. Full story