They say “black don’t crack,” but does that also mean you can’t tell if an 11-year-old wearing diapers and her mom’s favorite blouse from the 80s is really a 48-year-old accountant and Meshell Ndegeocello superfan on vacation in Cancun who’s celebrating fucking a cabana boy with rock-hard abs by doing a little dance and screaming, “I GOT DAT DIIIIICK” to all her friends?

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