Drew Millard
Drew Millard is a petulant, rap-obsessed 12 year-old trapped in a 23 year-old's body. His favorite food is asparagus, has written for many different publications and is worrying this is sounding like the beginning of an OK Cupid profile. He lives is Brooklyn, but is from North Carolina. He really wants to meet Drake.
Articles by Drew Millard
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Justin Bieber Barfed Because He Hates Himself
Justin Bieber may have barfed because of "milk," drugs, or booze, but it was most likely caused by his hatred for his own life. Full story
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We Saw This: Ty Segall and Thee Oh Sees
The opener for Thee Oh Sees was a band called K-Holes. One of the members of their band saw my roommate and I standing in VIP not dancing vigorously enough, and came up to us and tried to motivate us. She swung my roommate around, and then punched me like six times in lockstep wi… Full story
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Jay-Z Barely Owns the Nets and That Barely Matters
Despite owning the most hilariously small sliver of the Nets’ pizza pie, Jay-Z basically facilitated the Nets’ migration across from Jersey to Brooklyn. He's the team's mascot, its public face, and he's laughing all the way to the bank. Full story
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A Thing or Two About Kanye West's 'Cruel Summer' Album
Seriously, fuck 'Cruel Summer.' Fuck it all over the place. Fuck it in space. Fuck it underwater. Fuck it next to a plate of green eggs and ham. Full story
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I Am Letting the Machines Run My Fantasy Football Team
I wanted to be active in my fantasy football league this year but I forgot to show up for the draft and the computer picked my guys for me. I'm fine with it—the team's not that bad, and it's just a matter of time before robots run the rest of my life anyway. Full story
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We Saw This: Angel Haze
Angel Haze may very well run the city one day, but for now she’s still fighting amongst the pack of other rappers scrapping to be on top. Full story
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Reddit's Spacedicks Section Is the Internet's Actual Asshole
I don’t know about the internet-ing habits of the President, but it is unlikely that Obama is familiar with the subreddit /r/spacedicks. The banner for the page consists of a flying severed penis with a rainbow trail leading into someone’s prolapsed butthole. Full story
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We Interviewed Lunice from TNGHT
If you’ve ever heard music by TNGHT, aka the project of Glaswegian producer Hudson Mohawke and Canadian beat-thumper Lunice, you know it’s completely fucking insane. Full story
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We Saw This: Action Bronson, Flatbush Zombies, and Meyhem Lauren
As he’s evolved as a rapper, it’s become clear that Bronson is his own man. A former chef, his raps are largely concerned with culinary matters, as well as having lots of weird sex. Full story
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Vinny Cha$e Taught Me How to Dress Swag
The idea was this: Vinny Cha$e and Kid Art, two thirds of the Cheer$ Club rap crew, would dress me in their clothes and take pictures of me. Full story
Deportee Purgatory
Welcome to Tijuana’s El Bordo 
'Leviathan,' I Love You
James Franco at the Movies 
Juggalos Are OK, Cupid
Don’t Be a Tumblr Asshole 
Get Rich or High Trying
The Coming Age of Corporate Cannabis 
Triple Hate - Part 1
The KKK vs. the Crips vs. Memphis City Council 
Rave and Hardcore YouTube Comments
They Will Restore Your Faith in Humanity 
