Hey Ron!

Hey Ron! - Occupy This

I can write on my sign, "I just don't like none of y'all." Because none of y'all are making any damn sense. Full story

Hey Ron!

Hey Ron - Nothing's Worse Than a Little Power

It's funny how the tiniest bit of power can turn the nicest people into total dicks. Full story

Hey Ron!

Hey Ron! - Eli Manning Is a Turd

I'm a New Yorker, so I love the Jets and I love the Giants—I bleed blue and sometimes green, depending on the weather—but I hate Eli Manning with a passion. Full story

Hey Ron!

Hey Ron! - Ray Dog, Real-Life Omar

I want to tell you about a real-life vigilante I used to know named Ray Dog. He wasn’t a big guy, he was just a very, very good fighter. His two brothers were well-versed in martial arts, and they taught him how to fight. Full story

Hey Ron!

Mixed Meats

Whenever people ask me what type of meat I like, I always say dark. It’s not that I’m racist, I just like dark meat. It’s juicier and has more flavor. Now, white meat can taste good if it’s blended, but all white meat doesn’t work for me. Full story

Hey Ron! - Let's Address This

I'm not big on tattletales. If someone has a problem with another person he should address them by saying, "This is my problem. This is what I like or don't like." Full story

Hey Ron!

Hey Ron! - We're All Broke

I've been poor. It's tough. But you make it harder on yourself if you don't know how to handle your money. The last thing you want to do if you're broke is try to keep up with the Kardashians. You'll always lose that battle. Full story

Hey Ron!

Hey Ron! - Riot Ruminatin'

The closest I've come to being in a riot was during the blackouts of '77. We were so ignorant. We destroyed our own neighborhoods and fought against each other. Full story

Hey Ron!

Hey Ron! - Who Wants to Be a Punk?

I grew up in the projects on 100th between Park and Madison. In my neighborhood, a punk was someone who couldn't fight or didn't do dangerous things like the rest of us. Full story

Hey Ron!

Hey Ron! - Customer Service Suffering

For some reason I've been dealing with a lot of customer service representatives lately. As I'm sure you know, they are the worst people on the face of the Earth. What's more, you have to fight an automated system before you get the privilege of talking to one of them. Full story