Articles by Thomas Morton
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Fringes
War Gin
Ugandans are the hardest drinking Africans in the motherland, both in terms of per capita consumption and the hooch they choose to chug. Waragi, or "war gin," is what they call the local moonshine, and it makes the harshest Appalachian rotgut taste like freaking Bailey's. Full story
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Uganda Look at This Slideshow?
I've been here for a week during an ebola outbreak, which by broadcast news standards makes me an expert on Ugandan culture, politics, and society. So here is a definitive pictorial guide to the country "The Last King of Scotland" was set in. Full story
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The VICE Guide to Ugandan Sex Slang
Hope this helps you understand that Ugandans are freer fuckers than you and me. I also hope it helps you find love next time you find yourself in the Four Kingdoms of the Great West Nile Republic. Just mind the AIDS please. Full story
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I'm Scared of Storks
Look at this thing. Who let this happen? A vulture scrotum poking out of a mantle of filthy feathers affixed to a two-foot-long pair of rusted old scissors? Full story
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The Best Newspaper on Earth
Uganda ranks 139 out of 170 in press freedom according to Reporters Without Borders, which must be some sort of French counting error because they publish the single greatest newspaper in the world, Red Pepper. Full story
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Americana
Big Sandy
Thomas Morton gets a lesson in heavy artillery at the Big Sandy Shoot, where gun enthusiasts gather in Arizona's western desert to test their rifles, canons, and machine guns. Full story
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Dear VICE - Grass Widow Wants Nothing to Do with You
"I read VICE's review of Grass Widow's record, and can't restrain myself from telling you that I find it fucking gross and despicable that you would run that excrement." Full story
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The VICE Guide to Travel
Takanakuy
Takanakuy is a fighting ceremony with roots in the Andes’s pre–Spanish, pre–Incan history. In the absence of pretty much any form of justice system—the Chumbivilcas state police department sports a whopping three officers—villagers and townspeople from the region save up their gr… Full story
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VICE News
Bride Kidnapping in Kyrgyzstan
Thomas Morton travels to the Issyk-Kul region of Kyrgyzstan to investigate the Central-Asian tradition of bride kidnapping. In episode 1 we meet Kubanti, a young man who is determined to be married by sundown. Full story
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Something, Something, Something, Detroit
Lazy Journalists Love Pictures of Abandoned Stuff
After suffering through the nation's worst and most concentrated examples of racial violence, industrial collapse, serial arson, crack war, and municipal bankruptcy following years of municipal kleptocracy, Detroit is being descended on by a plague of reporters. Full story
Thought and Memory
New Fiction by Ed Park
Malaysian Neo-Nazis
Fighting for a Pure Malay Race
The Strongest Dwarf in New Jersey
Remembering My Tormentor
Gay Men and Their Misogyny Problem
It's Not Cute Anymore
Snooping Around Nicolas Cage's House
So Many Bummers
Saudi Arabia's Feminist Revolution
It's Not Happening