• Don’t Hate the Player, Hate the Game

    In a nation that looks to professional sports for everything that it is missing—heroism, greatness, collective triumph—the spate of labor disputes that continue to rock pro leagues offers some sobering lessons.

  • Prolate Spheroid Preview

    There Aren’t Any Good NFL Teams This Year

    “How about parity in the NFL?” a man says to another man as they sit on a park bench and watch the traffic in the distance. “Yes, parity,” the second man says. How can he put the love he feels for his friend into words? He can't. So he talks instead about how every team in the AF…

  • Fightland

    Weightless History

    MMA is so new that it’s unhaunted by the nightmare of history. There are no curses in the sport, no doomed fighters, nor tragic figures with hexes placed on them or their ancestors. And when the better fighter wins, the crowd moves on.

  • The Mercy Rule

    Alex Rodriguez, All-American

    In all circumstances and in every way he comes off alien and affluence-perverted and so perversely and simultaneously self-regarding and oblivious that only the word "Miami" seems capable of summing it all up. His soul is upholstered in teal leather; his whole life is an overly a…

  • Sam Smyth Had an Oops Poops

    Sam Smyth is the talent manager for Girl and Chocolate skateboards. If you Google him, most of the links that pop up lead to pictures of him eating sandwiches or his photo website. While those activities make up a large part of Sam’s portfolio, I think his greatest achievements a…

  • The Cute Show

    Surfing Dogs!

    We all love dogs. But here at 'The Cute Show,' we REALLY love dogs. When you add in the fact that these dogs can surf... well, our cold little VICE hearts just about broke during this shoot. So please enjoy one of the most talent-filled episodes of the 'Really-Fucking-Cute Show,'…

  • Lyman Good Will Eat Your Soul if He Feels Like It

    Bellator is the second-biggest fight promotion around, Lyman Good is its star, and watching him fight is like seeing someone hold back from eating another guy's soul.

  • Wide World of Balls

    Reason for the Season

    Hockey is still DOA, baseball postseason is a-rolling, the Nets played inside a casino and it wasn't on TV, Deron Williams allegedly wears a wig, and some NFL guy is a pillhead.

  • Prolate Spheroid Preview

    Hot Young Stud Quarterbacks

    Now that there are a bunch of young guns who can play quarterback well, there’ll be a lot more exciting ball throwing happening. Which is good. Ignore the purists who bitch about change—remember when football was just 22 guys punching each other in the mud?

  • The Mercy Rule

    Adopting October

    Who do you root for if you don't have a team in the postseason? While there are no wrong answers to this question (except for "the Yankees"), if you're not cheering for the Oakland Athletics, you're probably a jerk.

  • Hey Internet, How Should Football Change?

    Just for fun, I recently went on 4chan’s sports forum and asked what they would change about the NFL—the thread is long dead, but here are the five most radical, compelling, and totally unrealistic suggestions that came back to me.

  • Popping the Marks

    Who Will End the Undertaker's Streak at Wrestlemania?

    Yes, the Undertaker’s 20-match undefeated streak at WrestleMania, which began back in 1991, needs to be broken. It’s wrestling’s cycle of life. The stars of each new generation must feed on the bones of the generation before them.

  • Lance Mountain Kind of Led a Skateboard Tour of New York

    Nike SB organized a kind-of walking tour with the release of Eric Koston’s second Nike shoe. I say kind of since I barely knew what the hell was going on, and felt the same as when I first tried to play an RPG, led around, hoping to end up somewhere cool.

  • On the Wagon

    Brain seepage, I think to myself as I watch paramedics tend to a rider who’s been ripped from his saddle. He’s not getting up. It’s the first hour of the first day of the National Championship Chuckwagon Races in Clinton, Arkansas, and I’m just realizing how dangerous this sport…