In the Windsor Convoy 2 Zello channel, truckers have been organizing their protests against Canada’s vaccine mandates. On Feb. 7, the group decided to sing the Canadian National Anthem. DanSmith! Had just sung the line about “son’s command” when Turd_Sandwhich broke in.
“18 NAKED COWBOYS IN THE SHOWERS AT RAM RANCH!” A voice crooned over a sick metal guitar lick. This is “Ram Ranch,” an explicitily pornographic song by Canadian adult film star Grant MacDonald. As first reported by Rolling Stone, people opposed to the trucker protest in Canada are using it and other filthy sound clips to disrupt the organization efforts of the convoy.
The protests started in late January and the truckers have been using the Zello app to organize for much of that time. The app mimics walkie-talkie communication and allows users to create rooms where anyone can send short voice clips. It’s not secure, and once someone knows the channel name, it’s easy to slip in and disrupt the conversation. Increasingly, people are using “Ram Ranch” to do that disrupting.
The counterprotesters are sharing clips of the song disrupting communication on Twitter under #RamRanchResistance. “You guys, like I was saying, are nitwits who trust too easily,” one counter protester with a Canadian accent said in a Zello chat while MacDonald sang about sucking cowboy cock in the background. “The cops are comin’ to hit hard. They have all the information they need. You guys are welcome. RAM RANCH RESISTANCE!”
One of the organizers of the counterprotest told Rolling Stone that Ram Ranch is meant as a subversion of the convoy’s patriotism. “It’s a deeply conservative belief system infiltrating our city,” the organizer told Rolling Stone. “And when we played this song to jam their communication, they’d get extremely angry because it’s an explicit and LGBTQ-friendly song.”
On Feb. 14, Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau invoked emergency powers with an eye toward shutting down the protests. The move gives Trudeau broad powers to remove the truckers by force, though the PM has ruled out sending in the military. Still, the truckers were worried and they attempted to organize on Zello to find a solution. It went as you might expect.
BuzzFeed News reporter Paul McLeod monitored the Zello chat throughout the day. “After another guy goes on a monologue about sucking off truckers, the protesters are trying to figure out how to kick out all the Ram Ranchers,” McLeod said on Twitter. “‘I don’t understand what’s happening,’” says one woman. “‘People are just disgusting.’"
The protests have shut down Ottawa for two weeks. Truckers blocked Ambassador Bridge, one of the biggest trade routes between the U.S. and Canada, for several days. And while the truckers try to talk to each other, the Ram Ranchers are there to disrupt communications and talk about the joys of sucking cowboy cock.