Gird your tender loins—it’s Thursday, which means we’re galloping down to the General Store of Sales and not leaving until we’ve filled our proverbial saddlebags with enough deals, deals, deals on sex toys, fall wardrobe staples, and retro kitchen gear to feed, clothe, and lend a “helping hand” to an entire army.
That's right—it's time for this week's best stuff that's on sale, where we captain our virtual shrimp trawler through all the on-sale goodiez on the wild wild web and compile a list of our faves. Last week’s deals saw us traipsing through the world of camping gear and chore coats. This week, we’re peepin’ Bose Sleepbuds, vintage-inspired jackets, and tabletop grills that are perfect for spooky-season cookouts. Enjoy, fellow serotonin-seekers!
Not that kind of “sleepbud”
If you, too, have recently been waking up to the sound of a construction crew demolishing the building that’s connected to yours, you’re in luck. Bose Sleepbuds—which are 20% off right now—fill your sweet little ear-holes with relaxing, snoozle-inducing sounds that use clinically proven sleep tech to help you fall asleep faster, and stay asleep longer. This way, you can get a head start on dreaming about what you’re going to be for Halloween this year.
BIG BERTHA COMMANDS YOU…
… To stay hydrated, my dude. Believe it or not, the “Big Bertha” Mobot Foam Roller Water Bottle, though it does hold 40 ounces of liquid, isn’t specifically designed for malt liquor. No, it’s made to keep you hydrated, and also doubles as a literal foam roller that you can bring anywhere. It’s also 40% off right now. Disclaimer: Any weird looks you might get while rolling out on the floor of your local supermarket are not included.
Spooky season sex toys
Ella Paradis is basically giving away some of their most highly rated sex toys when you use the code FALL at checkout. Perhaps the item missing from your autumnal arsenal is the Better Love Blowfish Clitoral Stimulator? It features a “magic tongue” and a clitoral-stimulating sucking function—it’s a whopping 70% off right now. (Why does nobody invite us to the sucking function?)
Breakfast, but make it retro
Everyone wishes they had a Smeg fridge, but not all of us—or any of us—can afford to purchase a four-pack of IPAs, let alone a new fridge to plop them in. (And if you do have the cash to buy a Smeg refrigerator, you should probably be shopping for like, ridiculously expensive mirrors or something.) Instead, pick up this on-sale, retro toaster to give your countertop a vintage, 50s-inspired look, or snag the also-on-sale Smeg coffee maker to give your kitchen some, ahem, fresh new drip.
Levi us alone
We can’t come to the phone right now, we’re too busy driving a load across the country and falling in love at rest stops. This Levi's Men's Trucker Jacket is 43% off right now and makes the perfect addition to your fall wardrobe—although you'll end up wearing it year-round.
Gorp isn’t a phase, it’s a lifestyle
If you’re not hip to the gorp game, what are you doing with your life? The North Face 95 Retro Denali Jacket is 54% off at the moment ,and is probably what your dad was wearing whilst he hit on people at the ski lodge bar. Follow in his hoof steps, young mountain goat.
These sales just bespoke to us
First of all, home isn’t where the heart is—it’s where the ivory sheepskin is. Don’t have one yet? Fear not: We are your shepherd. This one from Farmhouse Pottery is on sale and available on one of our fave outdoorsy-stuff sites, Bespoke Post. It’ll be perfect for draping around your shoulders while you tend to the meat that’ll be sizzling away on your Berghoff Tabletop Grill, which is also on sale at Bespoke Post. Yerrrrrrrr welcome.
Pull your anchor and hoist these sales—it’s time to shop.
The Rec Room staff independently selected all of the stuff featured in this story.