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Woah, Dude!

Did Jack White Try to Beat Up a Member of the Black Keys Last Night?

Black Keys drummer Patrick Carney put White on blast early today in a series of tweets.

Jack White and the Black Keys have been beefing for years now. Or rather, Jack White has been beefing with the Black Keys for years now. It all started back in 2013 when leaked emails reportedly showed the White Stripes frontman calling the Black Keys "assholes" and accusing them of stealing his sound. Roll around to 2015, two years later, and it appears White's taken things out of the inbox and into the real world. Earlier today Black Keys man Patrick Carney tweeted the following:


I've never met jack white.

— Patrick Carney (@patrickcarney) September 14, 2015

Until last night.

— Patrick Carney (@patrickcarney) September 14, 2015

He came to a bar in Nyc I go to a lot with a few friends and tried to fight me.

— Patrick Carney (@patrickcarney) September 14, 2015

I don't fight and don't get fighting but he was mad!!!

— Patrick Carney (@patrickcarney) September 14, 2015

He is why I play music. The bully assholes who made me feel like nothing. Music was a private non competitive thing.

— Patrick Carney (@patrickcarney) September 14, 2015

Not sure what he's unhappy with cuz I just liked Zeppelin a lot and wanted to play guitar. Cut my pinky off and ended up being a drummer

— Patrick Carney (@patrickcarney) September 14, 2015

Obviously the Black Keys member's comments should be taken with a grain of salt. I mean, do we really think Jack White found out Carney's favourite bar then headed down there to challenge him to a game of chin checkers? Is this like when Rocky and Tommy Gunn have that streetfight behind a Philidelphia dive bar to determine who has the higher form of legitimacy? Or were these two dudes who play guitar just in the same place at the same time, eyeballing eachother across the known-brand American whiskeys they are contracted to drink in public?

I suppose the question is: is White justified for being angry at a member of the Black Keys? It's well documented that (forgetting about Tidalol) the White Stripes frontman is a musical purist: he recorded some of the band's albums on analogue tapes, owns a vinyl press, and is a fan of the good ol' American blues. I suppose you could say that the Black Keys, in some ways, ripped off The White Stripes and The Raconteurs wholesale? Well, maybe. All we know is, fighting in bars is not cool kids. I mean, for god's sake, if you are going to fight then at least do it onstage at an awards ceremony, so we can all watch over and over again, and then make some memes.

Here's how Patrick Carney ended his tweets:

Jack white is basically billy corgan's dumb ass zero t-shirt in human form.

— Patrick Carney (@patrickcarney) September 14, 2015

Is Jack White basically Billy Corgan's dumb-ass zero t-shirt in human form or are The Black Keys just as bad as Jack White? The world keeps turning.