Okay guys, we admit it: We got it wrong. The English Defence League isn't as dead as we thought it was, and in fact, it's going from strength-to-strength. How else to explain their decision to descend upon the small West Midlands town of Walsall to register their anger at all the peaceful, law-abiding Muslims who live there? The EDL know Walsall isn't a hotbed of Islamic extremism. They said as much on their own website. That's exactly why it was crucially important for them and their inevitable ascent into power that they should go to Walsall this weekend and end up covered in their own blood.
Roughly 150 of the EDL gathered in the centre of Walsall for a static protest, highlighting the decline of a group that could once rely upon 1,500-odd people turning out per demo. A few weeks before the protest, in a very bizarre confessional video, the EDL's leader Tommy Robinson announced he wouldn't be able to make Walsall because he'd be on his stag do with the lads, but to everyone's surprise he popped up to reel off another old speech before things got bloody.
As the drunken horde got restless and bored of the speeches, they surged towards the police lines in an attempt to break out. You'd think that, after the Walthamstow demo, they'd know how to pick their fights better. Apparently not.
The EDL quickly learned that half-empty cans of Stella and table legs are no match for police batons. Blood started spilling and arrests were made, a total of 20 by the end of the day. Meanwhile, a group of Asian locals gathered close-by to watch their nemeses get battered and humilated, something that's slowly becoming a spectator sport for the communities lucky enough to host EDL marches and protests.
By 5PM, Walsall was back to normal and the EDL had been bussed out of town. After all that bloodletting you'd think they'd finally realise that they're not welcome anywhere, but like a gang of suicidal lemmings they plan to return to Walthamstow at the end of the month for another waste of police time and the planet's oxygen.