NEW YORK – WHY DID RICHARD KERN STICK A BATON UP SOME GUY’S ASS?

We know there are people out there who don’t like what Richard Kern does for a living (prudes mostly, couple dicks) and would love to see his operation shut down. But changing your name to Richard Kern, going through the police academy, becoming a cop for two years, then arresting some guy for smoking weed and sticking the end of a baton in his asshole just to drag some photographer you’ve never met’s reputation through the dirt is beyond the pale. We hope our Kern makes it through this whole ordeal unscathed, but the fact that his NYPD doppelnamer bears a suspicious resemblance to a doped-up David Wojnarowicz doesn’t strike us as a good omen…