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Leave Your Lures at Home, Nerds: Rihanna Unveils No 'Pokémon Go' Policy

More like Pokémon No, amirite?
25.7.16

The Pokémon Go backlash seems to have begun in record time. Along with news that Nintendo's stocks are plummeting because a bunch of dumbass investors didn't do their research, now Rihanna–the Umbreon of Pop–has declared that the popular augmented reality game is a no-Go at her shows.

Fan footage from her date at Lilles, France, shows Rihanna including Go in a list of distractions that she won't permit at her concerts. Of note: she makes the very common mistake of using "Pokémons" as the plural of "Pokémon." FYI, it's a plurale tantum, like "fish" or "money." But maybe this newbie-ness is intentional? We know that Rih's secretly a gym leader herself so this might be an elaborate misdirection to prevent these pleb trainers getting in on her turf. What is her turf, you ask? Literally anywhere she damn wants, where did you think? In any case, watch her decree below.

Not the Pokemon Rihanna!!! pic.twitter.com/GA8qUpAwj5

— Shady Music Facts (@TheShadyFacts) July 24, 2016

Phil is a Gold/Silver/Crystal guy but he'll excuse himself from the conversation. Follow him on Twitter anyways.